Monday, April 30, 2001

HO HO HO!!!! Kink Calb maybe I can hook you up with my sister, GEORGE!!!

So today I was walk home when suddenly a dog barks at me. I scream at it "SHUTUP UP YOU CAPITALIST *BITCH*!!!!" and then it jump over the fence and started chasing me. It chase me down the street barking and I nearly shit my pants but it very hard to shit when running so hard. So ze dog jumps up and bites me in the ass, so the only way for me to get him to let go was one way... so I FART IN IT'S FACE and dog loses his death grip on my asscheeks. Then I jumped on top of the dog and start biting it, and then this little kid walking by was laughing at me, so I pick the dog up and THROW IT AT THE LITTLE CAPITALIST FUCKER, knocking them both out. Then this women walks by and she stare at me too, so I scream "TAKE THIS YOU DIRTY HO!!!" and I pull out by GIANT COMMUNIST BEEFSTICK and rape her in the bum until these guys in blue suits and badges came and started beating me with some really hard sticks! Hey, you get some you lose some!

And I think the dog was a DOBERMAN. I repeat, DOBERMAN!!! AUGH MY ASS!!!
}}}}}RETRACTED{{{{{

Sunday, April 29, 2001

I have reports of MiKE becoming very depressed that he lost his site to us HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! He is now a drug addict as you can see in the picture below.


Today I was walking down ze street minding my own business. Then this fat guy was staring at me, he must have stared for at least half a second. So I yell at him "WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT YOU CAPITALIST HEADCHEESE COLLECTOR!!" and he says "Your glasses are wack!" so I roll my sleeves up and knock him in the gut, then I grab his head and knee him in the face, and then I stole his CAPITALIST newspaper and wiped my ass with it when I took a shit later that day. No one makes fun of my COMMUNIST GLASSES. AYE!
The new regime will rid this site of its previous unclean elements!

The new leaders have a vision, and all staff members of the loyal supreme regime are committed to excellency.

ALL HAIL THE REGIME!

Slurrey is a dirty place, but under communist rule it will change, look forward to upcoming reports from Vladamir about what goes on with this site and the CHEAP WESTERN CAPITALIST PIECE OF CRAP that we took from "MIKE" and speaking of MIKE I hear that he is having a good time in the gulag with all the snakes and spiders and scorpions.

All those of you who didn't believe that we could hack this site, take this.

Disco Stu and Irish Bitch, you're right your impeachment doesn't stand....

I've Dismissed you ahhahahaahhaahahahahaha

The poll indicates that we have 100% support an unprecidented amount, our web citizens have given us the consent to continue with our present tacticts by an OVERWHELMING MARGIN!

ALL HAIL THE REGIME

--His Imperial Majesty Comrade Boris Mackarov

Chairman of Slurrey.communist

Saturday, April 28, 2001

VICTORY OURS! Idiot Mike should not have any other admin accounts on blogger! And I stole one! Now I disabled Mike access and change the site for the better! In the next fw days youll see big changes, we will regulate the site and make it what slurrey should be! COMMUNISM!!!! NOW!!!
I must say that I am very disappointed of MC Rae's and Jag's abuse of their power while I was gone. They fired both Irish Bitch and DiscoStu, and then started harassing people on the message board. I have now disabled their accounts, so don't worry this site isn't gonna change a bit!! Fuck that!
It seems like while I was installing my new $500 1Ghz CPU, I broke it. FUCK ANAL-TOUNGING CANINE RAPER!!!!! Sure they told me it was a delicate chip, but I didn't think it would be THAT delicate! So I had to borrow $500 to buy ANOTHER one! Shit!

And those needledicks at the local computer shop REALLY WERE trying to rip me off. The reason they tried to charge me so much for the labour was cause they were pissed at my dad for leaving his old computer there and not taking it back. Talk about tight-assed scrotumslappers!

So now my computer is officially back, and all the file servers are back online. I have been reading the forum for the past hour, and let me say that I am very pissed and will comment on this later. Fuckers!

Friday, April 27, 2001

Computer is still fucked. LONG, FUCKING HORRIBLE STORY!!! So I won't be back for a little while longer. The file server will be going on and off though. Sorry I still can't check the site properly or read my email.

Thursday, April 26, 2001

Hello every body...

I have a gun and I like to shoot people with it... if you would like me to shoot you please e-mail me or send a message to slurrey.com

Ummmmm..... where did that come from?.... Oh well.... the big computer is supposed to be fixed today so Yippe Kiyi FUCKING Yeah... now Mike can play with stuff and wreck it.... I just can't wait to see what he breaks next, maybe he'll fall over and hit his head on the cement, or Maybe if we are all really lucky George just might escape and eat him alive. If that happens I want it on video... "MIKE GREEN VAN... MIKE GREEN VAN"..... UNGH...... oh well I'm going to MacDonalds now so I can eat shit and throw it up later..... It feels good.... Really, try it...

Tuesday, April 24, 2001

Oh koooooool man, I can still post man, welcome the comedic stylings of cheech and chong:


(Soft knocks at the door)
CHONG: Who is it?
CHEECH: It's me, Dave. Open up, man, I got the stuff.
(More knocks)
CHONG: Who is it?
CHEECH: It's me, Dave, man. Open up, I got the stuff.
CHONG: Who?
CHEECH: It's, Dave, man. Open up, I think the cops saw me come in here.
(More knocks)
CHONG: Who is it?
CHEECH: It's, Dave, man. Will you open up, I got the stuff with me.
CHONG: Who?
CHEECH: Dave, man. Open up.
CHONG: Dave?
CHEECH: Yeah, Dave. C'mon, man, open up, I think the cops saw me.
CHONG: Dave's not here.
CHEECH: No, man, I'm Dave, man.
(Sharp knocks at the door)
CHEECH: Hey, c'mon, man.
CHONG: Who is it?
CHEECH: It's Dave, man. Will you open up? I got the stuff with me.
CHONG: Who?
CHEECH: Dave, man. Open up.
CHONG: Dave?
CHEECH: Yeah, Dave.
CHONG: Dave's not here.
CHEECH: What the hell? No, man, I am Dave, man. Will you...
(More knocks)
CHEECH: C'mon! Open up the door, will you? I got the stuff with me, I think
the cops saw me.
CHONG: Who is it?
CHEECH: Oh, what the hell is it...c'mon. Open up the door! It's Dave!
CHONG: Who?
CHEECH: Dave! D-A-V-E! Will you open up the goddam door!
CHONG: Dave?
CHEECH: Yeah, Dave!
CHONG: Dave?
CHEECH: Right, man. Dave. Now will you open up the door?
CHONG: Dave's not here.
SLURREY.COM is now operated by the McParhar coalition.

With Chairman M.C. Rae and Vice Chairman Parhar as your new leaders.

All hail their excellencies!

There will now be new rules to ensure this website is a better place

For the greater good of the website!
Good evening.


As many of you may presume and presume correctly, this will be the last time that I will be speaking to you as Vice President, as my retirement is coming in less than a week. I speak to you from an office which has done so much to improve the harmony and success of this website.

In all the decisions I have made in my public life, I have always tried to do what was best for everyone involved. Throughout the long and difficult period of the past few months, I have felt it was my duty to persevere, and to make every possible effort to complete the term of office to which you elected me.

In the past few days, however, it has become evident to me that I no longer have the support of the members. This is unfortunate as I must remind you it is I who told the President to open up the staff, it is I who offered most of you membership, and it is I who brought in referenda and impeachment to allow the staff to have a voice on affairs of the website.

As many of you know as of midnight this upcoming Monday, less than seven days from this time and date I am officially retired as a staff member. I will not be making any communication with anyone on the message board, or the main site from this point on (save required duties), and I have frozen all member rights as acting President until I leave office, including my own rights as Vice President and Acting President, in order to preserve the integrity of this website. In seven short days I will be gone my friends, gone for good.

I have never been a quitter. To leave office before my term is completed is abhorrent to every instinct in my body. But as Vice President, I must put the interest of the website staff first.

To continue to fight through the months ahead for my personal vindication would almost totally absorb the time and attention of everyone involved. I would not put anymore of my personal agenda before you, and to do so would be completely unacceptable.

My last duty will be to be present at the swearing in ceremony of Vice President-elect Chad Whittingham (Chadlei?) as Vice President, which will take place on May 1st, 2001.

In passing this office to the Vice President-elect, I do so with the profound sense of the weight of responsibility that will fall on his shoulders next Monday and, therefore, of the understanding, the patience, and the cooperation that will be needed from everyone involved.

As he assumes that responsibility, he will deserve the help and the support of all of us, and I know with Chadlei? at the helm this site will be in good hands, my very very best to you sir.

I regret deeply any injuries that may have been done in the course of the events that led to the controversial decision that I have made. I would say only that if some of my Judgments were wrong, and some were wrong, they were made in what I honestly felt to be the best for the website.

To those who have stood with me during this last difficult process of office thank you. Mr. White, you my friend voted with your heart on the article, and you have my utmost praise. Mr. Parhar, you my friend voted for what you truly believed in regardless as to whether I opposed you greatly. Mr. Whittingham, you will make a great Vice President. Mr. Andersen, you have stood by me and supported each and every decision that I have made over the course of the past months your loyalty is commendable. Mr. Heon, you have supported me all the way through rock on my man disco will never die. Finally, Mr. President, you have placed a great degree of trust in me as Vice President and as Acting President. I sincerely hope that all the decisions that I have made will no harm you in any way shape or form.

And to those who have not felt able to give me your support, let me say I leave with no bitterness toward those who have opposed me, just regret that we did not see eye to eye as it were.

I leave here with regret, but relief in my new position in private life, to quote former United States President Gerald Ford "Our long national nightmare is over." I am certain that some people will agree that this applies to me and my actions--fair enough.

To those who did not wish me to leave. I trust that you will aid the President and Vice President-elect to the best of your ability, and that you will continue the amazing progress that has been achieved under my supervision as Vice President of Slurrey.com

Each of us has somewhere to go and I sincerely believe that everyone would understand the actions that I have taken after reading this excerpt from poet Robert Frost's "The Road Not Taken"

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence;
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

I will leave history to judge my actions.

Good night, God bless you all, and may you all find your calling.

--Vice President M.C. Rae













Uhhhhhhh... According to a previous statement by our 'honorable' acting President, I believe I had till the 29th to vote. I do not care for the fact that my vote of NOT guilty will possibly be ignored an hour before I was going to vote. This is outragious and absurd.

Monday, April 23, 2001

"Where every step I took in faith betrayed me..."

This is my favorite quote and the story of my life. I didn't know that acting like myself around people who aren't yet used to it, though I thought they were, was a crime. Again, I'm sorry and whatever. I think at some point that I had been told to "stop taking things so seriously" by the same party who needs the advice in return in this case. I don't see why I have to walk on eggshells even in private conversation around people and act like something that I'm not. And I would like to know why I am perfectly truthful in the things that I say on this site and in private but no one is with me.

As if it matters. It was great while it lasted, I'm sorry that someone out there is getting a last laugh out of their own personal vengeance. And I may not be referring to the person that you think that I am.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have programming to be doing.

A bient�
ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT AGAINST IRISH BITCH

II. For gross disrespect of the Vice President, (including making threatening statements)*

*Amended as of 4/22/01

RESULTS OF VOTE


MiKE [NV]
M.C. Rae [Guilty]
Chadlei? [NV]
Kink Calb [Guilty]
The Platypus [NV]
Disco Stu 72 [NV]
Irish Bitch [ineligible]
The Great One [Not Guilty]


Guilty 2 Not Guilty 1 (2/3 majority of total votes cast needed)


MOTION PASSES


IRISH BITCH CONVICTED


IRISH BITCH you have hereby been impeached and convicted of the above articles, and are hereby removed from the staff of Slurrey.com. You lose all seniority, rights, and privledges as a staff member


This signed the twenty-third day of April, 2001.


--Vice President M.C. Rae
Presiding Officer



OFFICIAL MESSAGE FROM THE ACTING PRESIDENT

When a Vice President acts as President all of the duties, privledges, and responsibilities of the President.

Therefore I am envoking my option of closing the impeachment voting as of this moment. The votes tallied UP TO THIS TIME will stand against the accused and this action is not subject to appeal by myself or any successors to this office. The results will stand as reported and the decision is final.

Regards,

President M.C. Rae (act.)
My Dear friends,

I realize that the Irish Bitch has made a very compelling statement concerning her belief that she is not guilty of gross disrespect of myself.

However, one must take into account all the relevant facts before making these statements. Essentially, what this entire impeachment process boils down to is a statement that others on this website should not take for granted all the things that we hold dear in our democratic society. I would like to remind you that with the former impeachment process of Darth Tuna she made sexually explicit comments toward myself and others. She did not learn her lesson and proceeded to continue her insults.



Thank you,

H.E. M.C. Rae

Vice President and Acting President

Sunday, April 22, 2001

I plead not guilty based on the following:

This was a private conversation between M.C. Rae and I. I was simultaneously talking to my ex-boyfriend and was on a break from yet another programming assignment, which had me in not the greatest of moods. It was inferred that I am white trash simply because I live in the Southern United States, which I highly resent under ANY circumstances. I asked what I did to deserve that sort of insult, and he told me that he was trying to piss me off for his own amusement, which only made me more angry. I took it too seriously, I admit, and immediately retaliated by calling the Vice President a prick, which I apologized for not minutes after directly to him, and then later on the discussion board. I took full responsibility for my actions, which can be seen on the discussion board. Truthfully, I don't believe that it is of any interest to Mr. Parhar.

Any staff member that would like to see my ICQ history or any other forms of proof may feel free to speak to me on ICQ or email me.

I apologize yet again to M.C. Rae, like I have said before, everyone has their moments. I do not think of you as a prick, in fact I hold you in a very high respect. I apologize to everyone else for the situation at hand. I am hardheaded and strongly opinionated but I think that was known when I was asked to join the staff of this website. When I do things that are wrong or inappropriate, it is not usually not intended in that manner.

I hope that this will not be the last post that I am making. Thank you.
ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT AGAINST IRISH BITCH

His Excellency the VICE PRESIDENT has hereby authorized a motion of an article of impeachment.

Mr. PARHAR seconded by Mr. MCRAE state the following. IRISH BITCH is accused of the following violations.

I. For gross disrespect of the Vice President.


Please send your vote of guilty or not guilty to my address. The vote must be in by 7:00pm on APRIL 29th, 2001

All members except the accused are eligible to vote.
So the cocksucking $300 motherboard I bought just might be damaged. I know that I didn't fuck it up, so I took it to the local computer store to see what the problem was. Yes the same computer store that wanted to charge me $80 for them to install Windows. So anyways I go there and they tell me that the guy who gave me the price estimate fucked up, and the total cost to put my computer together, including the Windows installation, would be $69.

AAAH!!! Spent 4 hours of my life trying to build my fucking computer, just cause Mr Employee of the month made a bad price estimate? SHIT ON A STICK!!! So I am going to leave my computer there so they can do their thing, and I won't get it back until Thursday. So as of this post, the videos, webcam, and all other shit hosted on my computer will be unavailable until Thursday.

Until then, I will only be able to access the internet from my fuckin Dreamcast, so I won't be able to update or post anything. MC Rae will act as the president until I get back. So cya later, masterbaters (all 95% of you).

Saturday, April 21, 2001

And now for some official Slurrey linkage. DaGimp also lives in Slurrey and he added me to the cam portal. Pretty awesome site, and the "inappropriate" page made a big hole in my pants and somehow my cat ended up being stuck to the ceiling. Talk about good aim.
No, don't rip your pants off yet, I'm not officially back. I bought my 1Ghx AMD chip and top-of-the-fucking-line ASUS (don't even think it) motherboard yesterday. Total amout of cash removed from wallet: $800 even. I mean, having $800 in my wallet in the first place left a permanent indent on my ass, so no that my wallet is so empty I keep thinking I forgot it at the local whorehouse or something.

So I take the shit home. Tear open the new computer case, throw everything in, and power the fucker up. The double CPU fans start up, the hard drives moan and groan, the CD burner looks for a CD that isn't there... but jack shit appears on the screen! And not the kinda jack shit in the pictures I have on my computer... nooo I mean a blank fucking screen, and no beep.

As I was hurling the computer through the window, I remembered how I spent $800 on it, but thankfully it handed on the dog outside. The dog hasn't moved from there since. No I'm kidding, I'm not that violent when baked to a crisp (did I mention yesterday was 4/20?) but since I had no weedx0r at the moment I toked up some pencil crayon shavings instead. So I'm thinkin what the fuck happened!! I decide not to screw around with the shit anymore, and moved all my parts back to my old computer. I was gonna get some help from Robin, but I think he disappeared off the face of the earth cause no one answers the phone. So I get this other guy to fix my computer tomorrow. Then I'll really be online.
NOTICE OF REFERENDUM RESULTS

"Amendment to the Retirement Act"

His excellency the PRESIDENT transmits herewith the following motion:
At the date of M.C. Rae's retirement the following honours be granted to him:

1- The title "His Excellency" for life in recognition of his achievements as Vice President.
2- An annual retirement pension of $0.01.
3- Immunity from all prosecution.
4- That these honours may not be repealed.

Voting

MiKE [NV]
M.C. Rae [Yea]
Chadlei? [NV]
Kink Calb [NV]
Disco Stu 72 [NV]
Irish Bitch [NV]
The Great One [NV]


Yeas: 1 Nays: 0

MOTION PASSES
Is anybody Hungry?
Well, you certainly won't be after this little link...
www.Manbeef.com is a website containing ordering
information and may other "Helpfull"items on the subject of
CANIBALISM!!
That's right! this place LEGALLY sells human meat for profit...
you can get coffee mugs and t-shirts and all this wierd shit!
Go look @ it, then post comments on the DIScussion Board. K?

Till next time kiddies....

Friday, April 20, 2001

Britney Spears should read her bible more, perhaps it will change her "slutty" attitude.

"We have a little sister, and she has no breasts. What shall we do for our sister in the day when she is spoken for? If she is a wall, we will build upon her a battlement of silver; And if she is a door, we will enclose her with boards of cedar."

Song of Solomon 8:8-9

"... I have given you all the seed-bearing plants and herbs to use..." Genesis 1:12

It is a human right to have the freedom to use Mother Nature's herbs and plants for your own leisure. Yet it is illegal to use the drug and many are in prison for it, the ironic thing is you can get a REAL killer as in guns, and with a little 'training" and a piece of paper which says you may use a gun for leisure, its ok. Now that just makes me sick. Happy 4/20 to you all. Go rioters in Quebec! Free trade is immoral and unfair, those who are "the powers that be" should be pepper sprayed endlessly.
I would also like to wish everyone a happy 4/20. Coming from the best marijuana growing place in the world (or so I've heard) I feel it is my duty to celebrate this holiday. Despite the fact that I've never smoked marijuana in my life the good thing is that today everyone is a stoner!

Rock on!

--Vice President M.C. Rae
I'm very nervous about the end of this year. I am at odds with my parents and do not want to live in their house with rare and slow access to a computer and a 1am curfew. I also don't want to be in the same town as my ex-boyfriend because he will try to talk me into going back to him. I can stay here for now because the friends that had been so willing to drag me around the country or even Canada to find another place to live have temporarily wussed out. My tax return will enable me to put my deposit on for a summer sublease.

It is 4/20 everyone!! Now granted, the stuff in this area is not usually good but since I've been looking for a while, I have found something of very decent quality. So after a undetermined time this evening, if I'm here at all, I'm going to be quite....amusing.

One last thing: my friend Tim found this flash cartoon that had all of us rolling on the floor. It stars Charlton Heston and Bill Clinton. Check it out.

Thursday, April 19, 2001

Ok, I'm back already. Today I took my computer to the shop to get it upgraded. Instantly, the guy there tells me "Well now, you will be needing a new power supply, since these new AMD chips take up a lot of power. I recommend yo get this one for $80.. So I'm like "sneaky bastard" but decide to buy the damn thing anyways, since I'm not currently financially retarded.

So the guy goes to the cashier, I drag my computer in, and the guy tells me that the total will come to $950 after installing the $279 motherboard, the $239 chip, and the $80 power supply. I'm thinkin "WHERE THE FUCK DID ALL THE EXTRA MONEY COME FROM!!!" and the guy is like "Yeah, it's from the labour charges, we have to install all the hardware, plus install Windows for $80.

WINDOWS? WINDOWS 98?? INSTALL WINDOWS 98 FOR $80??

I look at the guy. I look around the store. Yes there is other people in here. Yes there is someone over there buying something. Yes this place still seems to be in business. A place that charges $80 do do something a lobotomized chimp could do is still in business. WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS NOT POSSIBLE IT DEFIES ALL LAWS OF PHYSICS AND REASON!! 80 bucks!! Windows! Some fucker is gonna get paid $80 to click "I agree", "Yes", "Ok", "Install", and "Reboot" for 30 minutes!!! INHALER OF FLAMING BUFFALO FARTS!!!!

So I quicky grab the computer and leave the place, hoping none of the stupidity in there rubbed off on me. So now I must install the chip and motherboard myself. That means that the server will be up and down for the next day or so, instead of being down all the time until sunday. $80 for Windows install.... I can't get that out of my head... geesh.
Today I got an A on my paper SWEET!

Three days in a row of exams, how fun this is going to be I cannot wait! Basically I am really pleased that this semester is almost over and then summer vacation can start finally, and it's about freakin time.

Now a degrading rude message in MiKE's absence: Penis Vagina Vagina and Penis

Thanks


President M.C. Rae (act.)
OFFICIAL MESSAGE FROM ACTING PRESIDENT M.C. RAE

As per my constitutional duty, The President does not have a computer and thus cannot exercise his duties therefore until I am relieved I am acting as President of this site. I have taken the liberty of being more crude than before. For example my Slurrey Girl post.

Thanks everyone

Acting President M.C. Rae

Wednesday, April 18, 2001

CAN YOU SOLVE THE MYSTERY?



Since we're lazy motherfuckers, we need YOU to find out who attacked Skeef the Sock Penis!! Hidden somewhere on this site, are pictures of the attackers. If you're the first to find all three pictures, and send them to me, here's what you win:

- 1 CD containing all of our videos, including the Slurrey Shows and Copside 2!!!!
- You get to post on this site for a week!! And if you are an amazing poster, you'll become part of the staff!

So, look around this site and try to find these incriminating photos!! They are VERY hard to find.... AND have a tendency to move around too!
(please note that staff members are ineligible for this contest)
NOTICE OF REFERENDUM

"Amendment to the Retirement Act"

His excellency the PRESIDENT transmits herewith the following motion:

At the date of M.C. Rae's retirement the following honours be granted to him:

1- The title "His Excellency" for life in recognition of his achievements as Vice President.

2- An annual retirement pension of $0.01.

3- Immunity from all prosecution.

4- That these honours may not be repealed.


Send the vote to chadmcrae@yahoo.com as usual

This is really just a formality and if it passes will be the last referendum until the Vice President-elect takes office

Voting allowed until 8:30 pm April 20th, 2001

Who Beat Skeef???



Skeef the sock penis was unable to make a new news broadcast last weekend because of him getting beaten up, and not in the way that he likes either. We are currently investigating the situation, trying to find clues as to who beat up Skeef. And you know what? YOU can help solve the mystery! Details coming soon!
And now a message from MC Rae:

===============================
RETURN OF WRIT OF ELECTION

FOR VICE PRESIDENT OF SLURREY.COM FOR THE REMAINDER OF
MC RAE'S TERM (MAY 01-AUG 17, 2001)

Mr. PRESIDENT, I hereby proclaim WHITTINGHAM, CHAD as
the winner of the Vice Presidential race. He is
officially the Vice President-elect as of this date
and per the results given below.

PARHAR, JAGDEV 2 votes

WHITTINGHAM, CHAD 4 votes


This signed the eighteenth day of April, 2001.

Vice President M.C. Rae
===============================

I'd like to welcome Chadlei ? as the new VP elect of Slurrey dot com!

Tuesday, April 17, 2001

What wack weather we have here!
So today I start work, and as I'm drilling outside (note - not the kind of "drilling" that happens at a certain company which begins with a "G" and ends with "ARAVENTA"), it started to pour rain. I was about to yell out "GODDAMNIT!!!!!!", but knowing that the building across from this site was occupied by many christians, I yelled out "FUCKING COCKSMACK GORILLA SHIT WEATHER!!!" instead. Within 5 minutes I was soaked, and was wondering why the fuck people shower if they live in a place like this. Oh wait, probably cause they have NICE WARM FUCKING OFFICE JOBS where they DON'T NEARLY DROWN in Vancouver's shity weather!!! Suddenly, out of knowwhere, the sun appeared! Jeezus lizard, it looked like it was going to be a nice sunny day. Then, suddenly again, the wind picked up. And a nasty cold wind at that, the kind that you don't want to be in while drippin wet. So as I was slowly freezing solid, water from the roof started dripping down and soaking me even more. I yelled out a few more expletives and went back to drilling stipid pointless holes in the concrete. Then, 15 minutes later, the wind stopped, and also the water from the roof stopped pouring on me. I was happy. And just as the sun was thawing me out, it disappeared and MORE FUCKING RAIN soaked me all over again! Oh that is so funny laughing at my own misfortune. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA fuck.

Other than that, I really enjoyed this day.
I drink, therefore I am.
Oh baby oh baby oh baby.
So, this beautiful thursday morning, I am taking my computer to the local computer shop to get upgraded. See, the AMD 450 chip in my computer is so outdated, that a fucking dorito could do more gigaflops than it (and taste better too!). I shall be getting a screaming fast AMD Thunderbird 900mhz, and a new motherboard too. But, I must take it in to the shop so they can install it for me, which will take 2 days... (last time I tried to install a motherboard, it ended up in 3 flaming pieces and I ended up with third degree burns on the side of my head). Don't ask.

Since the big juicy files on this site that you all love are hosted on my computer, that means you won't have access to them until sunday. So from thursday morning until sunday morning, these won't be available:

  • My webcam
  • The video files
  • The COPSIDE site
  • The MP3's
  • The Slurrey Shows
  • Me


So before you go through withdrawl, just remember, Slurrey.com loves you, and the horse you rode in on.
I went home this weekend and a few things sucked: Carowinds (large theme park in Charlotte) raised its price by $11 to something a little beyond the typical college student's cash range. I'm sorry if I don't want to pay $40 to wait 2 hours to get on a ride. Hell no.
We also were ALL dead each night so there was no clubbing in Charlotte, which is something that I have been wanting to do for a while.
On the up side, we got to take showers without wearing shoes, eat real food and I got to drive my stepmother's convertible Camaro.

I woke up around noon (I HAVE to fix my alarm clock) to discover that it is SNOWING outside. It's April for God's sake! This state is too far South to be receiving snow or even temperatures worthy of snow during this time of year. The only time I've seen snow this late was in Connecticut (900 miles north) and that was unseasonable there too, only happened twice in my life.

My camera is messed up for right now and I haven't paid the attention that it needs to be fixed. There'll be another crappy picture up when I can fix it. But since I am going to be really fucking busy for the next few weeks before finals and with programming, that will be difficult. I may not have anything interesting to say on here for a while.

Monday, April 16, 2001


What the fuck!? A 10 grand bill? Incredible. I can't believe how much value is put into a fragile piece of paper... that you could easily eat by mistake or something. The US stopped making these bill because of the drug trade and shit. But hell, imagine having one of these babies in your wallet?

MC Rae's uncle in Vermont supposedly has one of these. I wonder if I could borrow it and put my photocopier and scanner to good use. Now did I type that out loud?
Do you have a website? Do you want to link us, and give your website visitors seizures? Well we have the perfect solution for you! Just put this button on your page to link us!
And now, the time has arrived for the photo of the two vice presidential election candidates. Only staff members may vote on this one.

Note to all staff members of this site, FUCKING VOTE!!! Thank you and have a nice day.
Yes I would never ever install a windows beta of anything on my computer even if it came in a nice shiny box, or with a fox. I would not use it in my house or with a mouse, I would not, could not use it here nor there, I would not use it anywhere. I do not like Mircosoft betas that are too new, I do not like them DiscoStu I do.

Yeah thats about as scarey as some of the stories I've heard from people who have tried that Windows XP beta, "look mums! its got a shiney new login screen so you can't login to see what I gots stored on me hard drive! whooopie, what a wanker!"

Sunday, April 15, 2001

FUCK MICROSOFT UP THE ASS WITH A CATTLE PROD.
So there I was, saturday morning surfing the internet minding my own business. Then all of a sudden I see "hey look, Internet Explorer 6 BETA is available!". So, always being the first to doenload new beta shit, I downloaded IE 6 with anticipation of what would be improved.
Then I installed the fucker and ran it. Ok, yahoo loaded up a lot faster than it used to. So then I type in the address to my favorite porn site, and IE 6 BETA so gracefully told me: "IE is going to crash now, would you like to send Microsot all your personal information so they could figure out the bugs and send you spam mail?" Of course I replied "fuck no" and loaded up IE again in all forgiviness. I try another site. Oh my, IE has crashed ever so nicely again. Ok, by now I was beginning to panic and rage at the same tim. So I try another site. Crash! Another site. Illegal operation! So fuck, I try all these sites and none of them load up without Microsoft's piece of shit crashing. The only site that DIDN'T crash IE 6? Microsoft's site itself! It's like microsoft.com was the only site tested with IE 6 BETA before it was released to the public! FUCKOCK!!! So I download IE5 over again, and tried to install it:

"You cannot install this cause there is already a newer version installed!"

So I take my shoe off and chuck it at the computer, and scream every 4 letter word ever created at the top of my lungs, while smacking the keyboard with my face. My, what a predicament I was in. Microsoft had me firmly by the balls, and there seemed to be no way out of this any time soon. What were I to do? Was I banished to using Nutscrape Masturbator 4.5 for the rest of my life to surf the net? FUCK!!! The very thought of that made me soil myself 3.2 times in a row!!! So I spent 2 hours trying to go back to IE 5, and finally I found a program on my hard drive that would reset my IE back to the old version i was using. Joy.

And that ends the story of my latest battle with Microsoft. Now I wonder why Bill Gates named his company after his penis.

Saturday, April 14, 2001

OFFICIAL MESSAGE FROM THE VICE PRESIDENT

NOTICE OF ELECTION

The nomination period has closed and the following people are candidates for Vice President

The Great One (Jag Parhar)

Chadlei? (Chad Whittingham)


The election starts NOW and closes at Midnight Apr. 17th

Staff members send your vote to chadmcrae@yahoo.com

This is a SECRET BALLOT and who you voted for WILL NOT be posted just the totals.
SKEEF THE SOCK PENIS HAS HAD HIS ASS KICKED!!!
Skeef is in critical condition right now inside the dryer, after getting beaten up by two unidentified individuals. One individual has been quoted saying "I've been waiting a long time to do this..." and proceeded to brutally assault Skeef. The incident came to a rapid end when Skeef suddenly threw up all over the place. We have incriminating photos of these two persons attacking Skeef, and they will be posted on this site very soon!

Friday, April 13, 2001

I'm going home today!!!!!!!! Yeah my family's not that exciting but somewhere away from here is. Two hours in a car is well worth it. I get to see my best friend, probably go bug her at work, get to beat some sense into Mr. Infamous Ex, and get to go to Carowinds (theme park). I will be home on Sunday night. I'm so wired that I can't sit still. Anyone who talked to me last night noticed that I was....bluntly, completely out of my mind.

Oh, and the world is coming to an end. Today is Good Friday and Friday the 13th on the same day. Freaky freaky stuff!

Thursday, April 12, 2001

heeeeeeeeeyyyyyy ever buddy is me i am noy ded i are alive but i amn afugu cauqse me me me me an i didnt eat it k later.
I HATE DOING MY FUCKING TAXES!!!!!!!! ARGH!
I am filing my taxes via the net 'cause I'm a scatterbrained little twit and I always forget to mail important crap out. Well the first site that allows me to do this fucks up from bad programming about three or four times and resets my whole form after I've done like 12 pages. I scream and cry and throw my roommate's possessions around the room and then I try another site. This one does not reset my form (even if it did, this one saves after every page) but it's slower than rubber cement flows. It took me nearly two hours to do all of this crap, along the way developing a hideous stress headache and a pain in my jaw from grinding my teeth. It was worse than programming and finding a bitch error that I can't seem to fix (I'm stubborn, so I tend to waste hours fighting with Visual Studio before asking for help). Speaking of which, I have a program due in less than an hour and a half but since I have to reinstall VS for the umpteenth time and my CD is in Florida, I'm screwed until tomorrow. Lovely little 20 point deduction. Yeah...soo...my tax return better be worth the trouble and effort that I gave toward filing it.

Oh and my ex is still insinuating that I should get back with him if I go home...LEARN YOUR LESSON!!! Do NOT break up with someone for absolutely no reason out of the blue and then expect them not to be jumping up and down for the chance to reconcile. Second chances are not my style in that situation.
Daddy do you want some sausage.... Daddy do you want some sausage.... Man Tom Green is FUCKING hilarious and I for one can't wait to see his movie... Oh yeah and Stupid Chadlei who dosen't call very often should really stop whining about Tom and Drew Berrymore... He is fucking hilarious and famous you are just a nobody damnit and that goes for Gavin and Gwen too you horny fucking bastard... You are obsesive... can't you wait like 2 years or something? You will be famous along side Cupcake and the Platypus.... So quit whining until your in their league... Oh yeah back to the movie, It is gonna kick serious ass. Mike you are commin with me, actuall any one can come too I can take 4 not 5 people, so no extras damnit....

So Mike, you wanted me to post another story, well.... here it is... (parts of this one may not be true... but it still sounds good)
This one's for you MIKE.... Enjoy...

It all happend last friday night.... The Platypus and his woman were driving home when they saw a struggle next to some bushes.... the platypus decided to investigate... to his suprise he saw three little men poking a tall ugly guy with electrical sticks... The Platypus reckognized the Massive Ugly guy as Derek Driblenoze... Now youu all have to understand That the Platypus and actually nobody liked Derek... So the Platypus went back to his car and watched in ammusement as Derek was assulted by these three odd little men... moments later a bright light shone down through the sky illuminating the three little me who turned lime green in the bright light... suddenly, out of the bush came a seven foot alien who grabbed derek by the shoulders and bent him over his knee... the little green men then rammed their sticks simotaneousely into Derek's not so virgin ass... The Platypus thought to him self "Hmmmm.... so that is anal probing..." The probing went on for at least five minutes, The Platypus was getting bored and was about to leave, when all of a sudden the big green Alien lifted Dereks mutilated carcus over his head and then devoured him whole... The Aliens then vanished, as usual, without a trace... The Platypus said to his woman... "Well, that must have been a pain in the ASS"... The Platypus and his woman then went home and.... well.... you can probably guess what happend after that.... Thank you and Good Damn Night....
The Platypus.... I will return...

Please look for the Gay Homosexual adventures of Derek and Josh.... Comming soon to Blogger... and Slurrey.com

Wednesday, April 11, 2001

Well that motion that I passed earlier extending my term was a conflict of interest. A Vice Presidential election must be held every six months regardless. Therefore the current Vice Presidential term ends on AUGUST 18h, 2001 at noon

Anyone wishing to submit their name as a candidate must submit it to me chadmcrae@yahoo.com by APRIL 30th

I haven't decided yet whether or not I will seek a third term as Vice President.

The election will be held from June 7th-14th

The Vice President will take office on August 17th at 12:01pm
I think hitting the age of 18 over a year ago just opened up the issue of pregnancy into my life permanently. I watched so many people who, in my small Southern town, honestly thought that their only mission was to love some dumb man and have his children, get pregnant one after another. But, it wasn't til I got here to college that I discovered that this trend, though slightly more unwilling, was also going on with college girls. Three of my friends, all within the same month, discovered that they were pregnant. That burnt me out with worry. 6 month later, the "epidemic" hits another spurt...my friend Jess IMs me at about 4am freaking out. She was one of the ones who had already been pregnant last semester. And rumor from home has it that my best friend in NC didn't come up on my birthday because she is also knocked up. What IS this...am I the only one that was beaten with "condom good, USE CONDOM" for years? This is really ticking me off.
My ex wants me back. I want to beat him with a sledgehammer. We can't always get what we want.
Why is it that when my roommate goes to take a shower, she leaves her music on full blast?
I do not want to get tested for mono, I do not want to get tested for mono....
Think I need sleep? I do too.

Tuesday, April 10, 2001

I made a few changes to the tracker. I aciidentally made it put a tracker in EACH fucking discussion board post, so each time someone opened a new message it was registered as a hit. That's why April 9th got so many goddamn hits. LAUGH AT THE IDIOCY!!! HAHAHAHA.... HAH!!! Anyways since this bullshit tracker doesn't count unique hits, here's the formula to figure out how many unique visitors we've had to the site that day.

hits divided by 4 (average # of pages a person looks at) and the answer divided by 2 (average times a person visits this site a day)

So lets put this formula to use. On April 10, we got 336 hits. 336/4 and then divided by 2 is: 42 unique hits!! Right now that's a pretty good number of people visiting this site, but once it reaches over 1000 unique hits a day (should take few months), then this'll truly be a popular site!
Blogger is fucking retarded. When it crashes AFTER delting staff members, woopdedoo looks like they ain't deleted after all! I wish that Blogger was a physical objet so I could smack it around with a frozen salmon and then defecate on it.
Yowza.. I found this book in the closet, it's called
" The Third - And Possibly The Best - 637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said ".
I have started reading it and I noticed 2 quotes that I found interesting.
1) What you have when everyone wears the same playclothes for all occasions, is addressed by nickname, expected to participate in Show and Tell, and bullied out of any desire for privacy, is not Democracy; it is Kindergarten.
[Miss Manners (Judith Martin)


(2 How did sex come to be thought of as dirty in the first place? God must have been a Republican.
[Will Durst]

Until next time kiddies....
I wrote my history exam today, what a piece of shit.

I was three hours of PURE HELL, with some hot chick sitting beside me I was looking more at her than at the fricken exam, only after she left could I concentrate on the test. Why are all the hot ones always sitting beside ME damn it! It got so bad that I accidentally wrote "for the breast of the war" and the "cold war spread em all over Europe." These are actual errors! no joke. Good thing I proof read them otherwise my TA might have thought that I was coming onto her! Anyway it's too late and I gotta go to sleep.

Monday, April 09, 2001

Everything made by Sony is a piece of shit.
My Sony walkman, which I paid $80 for 3 years ago, got fucked up within a month of use. Everytime I would turn the volume, I'd hear static and sometimes the music would come out from only one side. Then I'd have to blow into the volume knob and lightly touch it until the sound came from both speakers again. Then, the headphone jack got fucked up the ass. I'd have to wiggle the headphone plug around also for the sound to come out of both sides. And sometimes when I only heard the music from one side, I wouldn't know if it was the volume control or the headphone jack!! Fucking colonmapper.

And now my Playstation. The CD drive is falling all to shit, I'm talking like the ball bearings and all that stuff just flying off the CD drive as it's spinning. One day I expect the whole damn disc to just fly out and hit me in the head (I leave the CD door open to play pirated games). And now I am about to part with $500 to buy a goddamn PS2. Why? Cause not only is it more powerful, but the PS2 plays original Playstation games too, and getting another Playstation would be a waste of money.

Hey I think I see Sony's evil fucking plan.

Once I get a PS2, I will buy many games for it just like I did with the PS1. When the PS3 comes out, my PS3 will suddenly start breaking down... so then I'd have no choice but to buy a PS3 to play all my old PS2 games! THOSE GREEDY KISSERS OF GROIN!!! Motherfuckers, I know they make their products automatically break after they become obsolete, so you would have no choice but to buy their newer shit. Well, lick my dog's tits Sony, I'm a loyal JVC follower now.
ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT AGAINST DARTH TUNA

I. For continuial usage of rude sexual comments in defiance of the censure motion passed by the members.


II. For gross disrespect of the Vice President.


RESULTS OF VOTE

MiKE [Guilty]
M.C. Rae [Guilty]
Chadlei? [Guilty]
Kink Calb [NV]
The Platypus [Guilty]
Disco Stu 72 [Guilty]
Irish Bitch [Present]
The Great One [Guilty]

Guilty 6 Not Guilty 0 Present 1 (2/3 majority needed)

MOTION PASSES

DARTH TUNA CONVICTED

DARTH TUNA you have hereby been impeached and convicted of the above articles, and are hereby removed from the staff of Slurrey.com. You hereby lose all seniority, rights, and privledges as a staff member

This signed the ninth day of April, 2001.

--Vice President M.C. Rae
Presiding Officer
I am back to my usual insomniac routines, and I was in chat to kill a little time...and THIS is what came into the room:
Nasty ass pedophile. The guy is old, not to mention butt fucking UGLY, and judging from his wife, no wonder he comes into chat looking to "cam" with someone else. The problem with this is that I was in a teen chat room. And the scariest shit of it all is that he lives in Virginia (but thankfully about a 5 hour's drive from here) because I don't want this gross, ugly, old, horny, nasty pedophile anywhere near me (benefitting also the local HS girls, MS girls, and some 13,000 female students at Tech). He also had a rather graphic pic on his Yahoo profile, which just iced the cake. And even though his face wasn't included in that picture...it, uh, didn't benefit him to have that in there. Now I'm definitely not going to sleep for fear of nightmares!

Sunday, April 08, 2001

Movie Review: "Left Behind"

First, some info about this film. It was released on video BEFORE being released in theaters. Why they did this, I have no clue. Anyways it was based on some supposedly really popular book.
This is a christian film, so don't expect any swearing, extreme violence, or good music. From the moment I stuck the disc in my DVD player, this horrible techo-pop shit that sounded like a backstreet boys song imitated by a retarded 10 year old. I reluctantly pushed play and prepared for the worst 90 minutes of my life.
Well the movie wasn't really as bad as I expected. There were a good amount of explosions, and the pilot guys daughter (played by Janaya Stevens) is extremely fuckable!! Damn. THe story still went by too fuckin slow though, and people were just too calm. If millions of people suddenly just vanished, it would be a hell of a lot worse. Riots, traffic jams (just how did everyone manage to get around with all the millions of abandoned cars in the middle of the street?), hell there probably wouldn't be electricity, cable, or internet service (and all three were used in the film). And that really bugged me.
Now let's talk about the picture quality. I kept asking myself "Is this really on fucking DVD?" cause, I swear, 90% of the scenes looked worse than they would do on a VCR. This DVD had EVERY type of compression arifact that can exist. Pixellation, graininess, blocking..... fuck it was like watching this movie off of a Sega CD. Maybe that's wy they released it in theatres after relasing it on home video... cause they fucked up the first time.
*spoiler*
We come to the biggers AARRGGHH-inducer of the whole film. The lack of a fucking ending. In any normal movie, either the good guy or the bad guy wins. Now in this movie, nothing really happens at the end. Nope, I there there should have been a "to be continued" subtitle or something so this movie wouldn't seem as if it was written by someone who threw it away before finishing it.
So the bottom line it, rent this movie if you are fascinated by the end of the world, think Janaya Stevens is hot, enjoy explosions, or are a christian. Other than that, this movie is a bomb.... and not in a good way either.
I created a button for this site in case you are insane enough to link us. Remember that this is a flash swf file, so when linking it you must use "embed src" instead of "img src, and you must also specify the height and width (88x31). This is it:


And if swf files scare the hell out of you, here is a shittier gif version:

Check out the webcam portal, there's a new face on it.
I'm doing my own video for YTV's "Final Cut" in addition to the rumored Copside 1 remake. My film will be a very dark, moody film with lots of dark humor. It does not have a name yet... hell I haven't even written the script yet. But here's who's in it so far:

M.C Rae
Eric Andersen

More info soon.
I added a tracker on each page so you can see how many fucking hits we get. To see our traffic, just click on the "tracking" button on the bottom of any page. Since I put up the tracking shit, we've gotten over 150 hits. Not too shabby.

I've added a new video to the video page. We made it in English 12 class and it was a riot. Check it out on the fucked up videos page.
Holy fuck! It seems that Frosty really did post that "kleenex galore/fuck frosty" pic that I sent to her. And so did Amanda. Sweet fuckin shit man! In case you missed it's brief appearance on my webcam, here is the actual pic:

Lesson #1: Ridding your keyboard of jizm
Hey hey hey Rhiannon's cam is back. I was just browsing through the Stile cams and saw her back. Then I proceeded to take my pants off very quickly and add her back to the webcam page, replacing Sonic_Tsunami's "cam". Well it wasn't really a cam it was just a picture that hasn't gotten updated in a week.

Coming up soon will be Disco Stu 72's disco song of the week. Presented by Skeef the Sock Penis... but you know what Skeef does to presentations. If not, you'll see.
I don't know what I missed last night but I am never here on Saturday night! Never! I leave around 9:30 and do not return until around 4:00.
Last night at Tau Delta was the Hairy Buffalo night, where they make their famous killer punch, which contains, as far as I can discern: fruit flavoring, triple sec, vodka, rum, tequila and maybe other things as they made other batches. I didn't have very much...I don't think it would have taken much to have me physically ill. But I spent as much of my time as possible with the person of my choice. One little thing went wrong though, during TD's traditional song ("American Pie") everyone forms a circle with arms on shoulders down in the basement and sings...well someone was drunk enough to still be holding a cigarette in their hand and they burnt my face half an inch short of my eye. My crush took blame on himself because he pulled me closer to him (as if I would mind that!!) and the hand with the cigarette was on his shoulder.
My webcam is mad at me. It was crappy before, now it just doesn't want to work. I'll mess with it when I get the chance, but I have a lot of work to do tonight seeing as how I was sick on Thursday and Friday and missed classes.
Well it seems that our host Fateback has crashed, and the entire website was deleted. Luckily, I keep a backup copy of the site on my computer, so all I had to do was reupload the fucking shit. I think there will be many pissed Fateback members though, cause almost every site got fucked up.

Skeef should have some great site news coming up later today. Tune in by visiting this page and listening to the realplayer stream when it automatically loads.

Saturday, April 07, 2001

ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT AGAINST DARTH TUNA

I. For continuial usage of rude sexual comments in defiance of the censure motion passed by the members.

II. For gross disrespect of the Vice President.

Please send your vote as "guilty" or "not guilty" to my e-mail chadmcrae@yahoo.com

All members except the accused are eligible to vote

--Vice President M.C. Rae
If there were bras made specially for balls M.C. Rae would wear size negative A cup.
Nobody loves me. Nobody cares.
There is something stinking in the basement. It smells like someone took a sizeable shit in there, let it rot for a few days, and then smacked it all over the place with a hockey stick. Unfortunately for me, my room is right in the fucking basement, so every time someone opens the door to my room, more of the smell seeps into it.

Then, the battle between that shitty smell, and the toxic burned plastic fumes from my room begins. I nearly failed chemistry, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out that the two smells neutralize each other and make my room smell normal again.

But... I like the smell of burning plastic! How the fuck can you not? It's so...... synthetic. Mmm good. So until the dead rat that is stinking up the place is found, I won't be able so smell the beautiful vapour arising from all the overheating electronic shit running in my room. Sob.
OFFICIAL REFERENDUM MOTION PASSES 6-0!

"An act to Censure Darth Tuna"


I, M.C. Rae VICE PRESIDENT of Slurrey.com transmit herewith the condemnation of the words and actions of Darth Tuna. She has over the past few months made constant explicit sexual references to herself, and took pictures of herself that are deemed to be inappropriate to the web community at large. The members frankly do not care to hear about her personal habits. Therefore, we have now officially condemned and censure Darth Tuna for corrupting the integrity of this site. Naturally, there is of course freedom of speech on here, however, her comments clearly exceed the limits and go beyond what any member has ever done in the past.

In addition, her comments telling his honour the Vice President to "suck [her] white ass" were clearly in defiance of good taste. She is censured by the staff, and if any of the following actions are repeated impeachment will occur and she will be removed from the staff upon conviction.

OFFICIAL VOTE RETURN

MiKE [Yea]
M.C. Rae [Yea]
Darth Tuna [inelegible]
Chadlei? [Yea]
Kink Calb [NV]
The Platypus [Yea]
Disco Stu 72 [NV]
Irish Bitch [Yea]
The Great One [Yea]

Yeas: 6 Nays: 0

MOTION PASSES
I like crackers.
We seem to be having problems updating the page. This will be fixed soon, or shit shall hit the fan.
I'm going to try this again...work, you bastard!
And all I really have to say, and have been trying to say for a while now....
Happy Birthday to meeee!!! woooohooooo!!!
Ahhhh, the good ol' days at Matheson, they were great. Time has come to to bring some of the good times back. Tommorow I will start doing a weekly "Skank Report" as requested by McRae.

Friday, April 06, 2001

Well, yesterday's survivor was especially asskicking without stinky monkeywhore Jerri's bitching. It was nice watching the whole show without feeling the urge to kick the TV screen in. And man I cracked up when the show's host bitched at them for having no food left, and he gave them some rice in exchange for their tarps. You know, after a month of eating fucking rice, I wouldv'e started eating the tarps themselves.

Elisabeth sure looked weak from the lack of food... if I was there I'd whip out the snake in her face and tell her "Guess what's really high in protein?!"
I wrote another poem... this one is so beautiful and meaningful... yes these will be published someday and I shall be famous. Hey stop laughing, fucker.

The old man put his shoes on
He went outside to take a walk
And on the ground he saw
A weak, dying mouse

He picked it up and took it home
And nursed it back to health
A few days later, the mouse was better
And the old man died from rabies.
Stupid fucker.
Muahaha! I fought my failing internet connection and won! Mess with me not, o ye of little reliability.
Not only do I have strep but I also have a double ear infection. Looks like I'm going to be more of a zombie because ten minutes after taking my first dose of the antibiotic, the high-powered pain killer and the decogestant, I passed out for 6 hours without even knowing what hit me. Thank God it's Friday.
Errr...Darth Tuna, sucking of the ass is a nauseating thought. No more, please, I'm a sick individual (but apparently not in the same manner as you).
One more complaint...my ex-boyfriend, who is still back in North Carolina, IMs me today and talks to me as if nothing happened. Mind you, the boy breaks up with me, over the phone, in 2 short, curt, rude sentences, then hangs up. 2 days before Christmas. And he was wondering why I was bewildered by him talking to me today!!! He's asking me all these jealous questions like whether or not I'm pursuing someone at the moment, like it's any of his business. He wants me to come see him when I get home from this semester. I have never been so shocked and amazed at someone's nerves before.
Okay, well, other than Jennifer watching a movie in here and crunching on some chips, the world is pretty damn boring and I want to post this before irony will hand me another tangle with my PMSing internet connection. I think I'll sleep. Sounds good. If I am online on ICQ later, it's because the TV was too loud to sleep. Oh well. G'night!
Me is not dead... just tiiiired.... night shift haRRd.. Posted to discussion board. read it.,... ok night night.

till next time kiddies....zzZZzzz....zzZZzzZzZzzzz....
Hey Mr vice president. SUCK MY WHITE ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
For the second time i must say people, you must download and try some songs by "chainsaws and children". they r a new band but im like SO addicted to their songs. My favs are definitely "screamjohnnyscream, newthead, and cannibal burn". P.S. napster still works! %)

Thursday, April 05, 2001

Here's a couple of really good, addicting songs that will remain stuck in your head hours after listening to them:

Black Halos - Some thing never fall.mp3
Ladytron - Playgirl.mp3
The Platypus made a button for this site, and it's lookin pretty fuckin good.
We are indeed making a top-secret film to send to YTV's "Final Cut" contest. What could it be? Well the truth is, we haven't decided what the fuck to do yet, but there are signs pointing to something involving the Copside series. Stay tuned for more info!
OFFICIAL REFERENDUM MOTION

"An act to Censure Darth Tuna"

I, M.C. Rae VICE PRESIDENT of Slurrey.com transmit herewith a motion to condemn the words and actions of Darth Tuna. She has over the past few months made constant explicit sexual references to herself, and took pictures of herself that are deemed to be inappropriate to the web community at large. The members frankly do not care to hear about her personal habits. Therefore, I am proposing a motion to officially condemn and censure Darth Tuna for potentially corrupting the integrity of this site. Naturally, there is of course freedom of speech on here, however, her comments clearly exceed the limits and go beyond what any member has ever done in the past.

All members are entitled to vote on this motion and all votes must be in within 48 hours, after which results will be released. Send a "yea" "nay" or abstention to chadmcrae@yahoo.com

Thank you

-Vice President M.C. Rae
I swear to it, NO ONE is allowed to complain about insomnia in front of me again! I'm the resident insomniac and anorexic of my group of friends. I go to bed, on average, at 6am or so, and eat a meal a day or less (again, on average). To say that I'm unhealthy is like calling the Grand Canyon a hole in the ground. Recently, I've crashed hard and fast like a cokehead with a $1000/day habit that has decided to go clean. I slept for 18 hours straight again after my last post, and am ready to go back to bed. Dinner? What's that? I'm more wasted than any drug addict and I'm only 19 (well 2 days short). I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, and to put it plainly, I'm terrified of the doctor, more specifically of needles.
I think I'll go to bed. Fuck programming, I'm sick of it and I'm no good at it, either. And it's literally making me sick.
Hopefully I'll be slightly more...normal (in my own way) tomorrow. Of course it's not normal for me to sleep so much but...I can't seem to help it.
Well the site is moving along well, you know since my election as Vice President in February our site's unique hits have increased by 250%! In addition we have moved from a staff of three to ten (9 of whom are human). We have a wider appeal and the improvements from the days of twistedmike.com are amazing. I have implemented many programs such as referenda where any member can submit proposals to be voted on for site change, and impeachment which can me used to remove corrupt members of staff.

My friends, we've done great Disco Stu 72's song has been chosen by the king of disco himself and will likely be integrated into Skeefs weekly show sometime this week. But we still have a long way to go, so look for changes coming throughout the rest of my term that will make a real difference to all members of our wonderous web community!

--Vice President M.C. Rae
Twisted Mike and Darth Tuna sitting in a tree ... L-I-C-K-I-N-G ....!!!!
Wow. I went about 2 weeks w/o masturbating until LAST NIGHT THAT IS! And holy FUCK it was amazing! Hell! Not even amazing covers it! It was like --INCREDIBLE OR SOMTHING! I don't think I've ever orgasmed like that before. Well, a big fat reason for it being so brutally immense might be cuz I haven't used my vibrator in a while and still! That things fairly new. I've also taken the liberty of naming that heavenly metalic blue mini machine! His name is "Bionic Vapour Boy"! He's named after one of my favorite songs by Mr Bungle. Great band. Great music. I have one hell of a diseased mind.... mmmmmm .... lunacy...... mmmmm ... Homer's "mmmm's" ....
Damn it!

I cannot sleep worth crap tonight, it is now after 2am and I am just as feisty as ever. I suppose that I am just one of those guys who keeps going and going and going. Well I am sure that there are plenty of cures for insomnia (like my History professor's lecture tapes), but I really can't be bothered. So now here I am sitting at this stupid computer just after 2 a.m. on a Thursday morning typing to a bunch of people who are probably going to laugh their asses off in the morning. This is not funny, lack of sleep is not funny, and then I have to drive to stupid SFU because TransDink workers have gone on strike. SCREW YOU bus drivers for making my life a living hell. At least I can see my groupies on Friday but that's over 24 hours away. This blows!

Wednesday, April 04, 2001

I'm feeling extraordinarily...blah (for lack of better words). Every year on or before (I prefer before) my birthday, I get strep throat. This year is no exception, and it's being made worse by my new medicine. Which brings me to an apology...I'm sorry for the single-lined posts of the past few days. I have ADD, which makes it really hard for me to sit and program for hours, so I finally was put on medicine for it for concentration. It, well, kind of made it worse. I've been hyper and unable to think in more complex ways than the single thoughts you were seeing. Then I crashed, and slept for about 35 of the last 48 hours. It's been fun.
Let's see...anything else to bitch about? I waited for nearly two hours for the phone to call the doctor this morning. I guess the secretary in this room is only allowed to answer the phone, not use it. And my best friend is not coming to see me this weekend for my birthday. I guess all I have left to look forward to is a night with my crush. Well...I'm going to go kill some more time sleeping....maybe some time this week I should eat something.
Fucking shit man, has anyone listened to the radio lately? They play the same shit over and over, until it gets old, and then they replace it with new shit that they play over and over again! Fuck, there's this one station around here (coughcoughZ95cough) that must have a playlist of only 15 fucking songs! And they all suck shit too, cause this station has prerequisits like: "Yeah we're a pop station that little bubblegum teenyboppers listen to, so we can only play music by boy bands that make themselves sound like girls, and glitter-coated sluts who sing retarded lyrics like 'Hit me baby one more time'"

Who thought a song about abusive relationships could be a number one hit! I'd like to smack Britney Spears across the head with a big stick.
"You want me to hit you one, or two more times, bitch!?"

Oh yes and you know why boy bands have such high voices? Cause they had their testicles removed. But sadly, some of them lose so much testosterone in the process that they have to become spice girls or other freaky girl bands that pre-pubescent girls scream at.
The VP Page is up, it's pretty much the Vice President's own page where he can say whatever he wants on it. There's some interesting stuff on it so check it out!!!
Rhiannon has taken down her cam. We will miss her and all her clothes-removing antics, but life goes on. Now I just need to quickly find a replacement camgirl. Hmmm who has recently sent me their webcams to be posted on the portal? Check it out.
YAY! I'VE BEEN DECLARED HOOKER OF SLURREY.COM BY TWISTED MIKE HIMSELF! Practically fell to my knees when he told me! Well, that was only because I was giving him head, but still! I was honored.
SLURREY MEMBERS APPROVE ALL THREE MOTIONS!

OFFICIAL RETURN OF VOTE

His Excellency the PRESIDENT hereby authorizes me to release the result of vote now:


MOTION 1. To offcially create the site slogan as:

"Slurrey.com a truly CanadE/N place where the bros meet the hoes"

MiKE [Yea]
M.C. Rae [Yea]
Darth Tuna [NV]
Chadlei? [Yea]
Kink Calb [NV]
The Platypus [NV]
Disco Stu 72 [Yea]

Yeas 4 Nays 0

MOTION PASSES


2. Members who have been absent from activity on the website for more than two (2) weeks are subeject to immediate removal by the President if he so desires.

MiKE [Yea]
M.C. Rae [Yea]
Darth Tuna [NV]
Chadlei? [NV]
Kink Calb [NV]
The Platypus [NV]
Disco Stu 72 [Yea]

Yeas 3 Nays 0

MOTION PASSES


3. To extend the Vice President's term of office from six months to one year (retroactively). And to fix the dates for the Vice Presidential election from February 7th-14th every year (unless a resignation occurs), and to have the Vice President sworn in as of the first Friday following his election. In case of resignation an immediate (4 day) election will be held to see who serves out the remainder of the term.

MiKE [Yea]
M.C. Rae [Yea]
Darth Tuna [NV]
Chadlei? [NV]
Kink Calb [NV]
The Platypus [NV]
Disco Stu 72 [Yea]

Yeas 3 Nays 0

MOTION PASSES







Hello Everybody....
Our Band page will be up shortly and when it is I will post the URL... When we finally get around to recording something I will put wav files or some other kind of crap up there... Just for YOUR listening pleasure... if you don't like it the tough live with it you god damned hypocrites... ummmmm... ok well that's all I wanted to say... Shit...
Attention Staff Members:

Please refrain from posting one line messages on this portion of the site.

This area is used for paragraph statements and official administrative messages.

For example, today coming home from SFU was hell, and it took me about one hour to get over the freakin Pattulo bridge. I sure hope that TransDink goes off strike soon because I cannot take much more of having to go. I am skipping classes today, and Thursday because of this stupid thing! Then God help me when it's time for finals. Isn't it ironic that all the traffic reports on X-FM are sponsored by Translink. .....Brought to you by Translink, the guys who brought you the six hour "rush hour"

(I know it's the bus union on strike, but hey everyone hates Translink)
LOL, no wonder im doing so bad in engineering. All i needed was more sleep! ahhhhh... forget it.

One more thing, just a question to the ladies in da house, why do you put your looks down all the time when you compare yourself to another lady? Based on other conversations i have had i have noticed this. Why not become diluted like me and say, "damn, im one sexy bitch!"

Tuesday, April 03, 2001

I read this in the newspaper. The recomended time ou sleep each night is 8 hours. Did you know that for every hour of sleep a night you miss over a week, your IQ drops by one point. And each hour yopu lose on top of that the IQ points lost doubles. So I get about 5 hours of sleep a night during weeknights. So I lose 7 IQ points a night over 5 nights. 30 IQ points gone for the week.
So assuming I have the average IQ of 100 and I lose 30... now I'm left with 70.

Guess what, during the week I'm a fucking retard!!! I'm surprised I could even do the simple math to figure that out..
Some brief site news:

MiKE updated the staff page to include the new staff members.
MiKE fixed the contact page.

Rhiannon's cam seems to be down at the moment... but there were unconfirmed reports of some boobage appearing on her cam about 3 am this morning. Whether it was Rhiannon's, someone else's, or no boobs at all, we will soon find out.
Seperated at birth?

What the hell? Same black and white, same head position, same facial expressions... man the webcam page sure freaks me out sometimes.
The Official Senority List of Members is now official

At this time I would like to remind members 1-7 that you have less than 24 hours to send your referendum vote to chadmcrae@Yahoo.com

The Questions were posted last Thursday look it up!

SENIORITY LIST

1. MiKE
2. M.C. Rae
3. Darth Tuna
4. Chadlei?
5. Kink Calb
6. The Platypus
7. Disco Stu 72
8. Irish Bitch
9. The Great One

Yes, how foolish of me. I forgot to mention that The Platypus is indeed my personal bodyguard. I suppose that good deeds often go unmentioned. He and I both know that RESPECT is paramount with my friends and if it is not occuring he will "take care of business"

I would also like to take this time to officially ratify The Great One and Irish Bitch and officially welcome them to the slurrey.com staff.
Good day to all this is "The Great One" speaking, I hope this site will go sky high in popularity! It's time we rise in the ranks!
P.S. That one was for you Mist'a Vice Presidante.....
Hah.... I would have PAID like 25 whole cents to see the look on Jens face when I Bombed her with that special question... Holy Shit she got pissed... For those of you who don't alredy know I am the loyal body guard of the Vice President of Slurrey.com, and future Priminister of Canada M.C.Rae... That was what we in the service like to consider as ''Taking care of business" oh yeah.... Weekends are very fun indeed... Any hot girls wanna have some fun drop us a line at any one of our e-mail addresses ;)... Ahhhhhhhhhh... Back to work...

Monday, April 02, 2001

I welcome the two new staff members to the site, Irish Bitch and Jag Parhar!! If you've seen their posts on the discussio board, then you'll know that this place is gonna get a lot fuckin wilder.

Oh and Skeef the sock penis went through puberty. Just listen to his voice!
I just fucking lost my post! ARGH **IS THIS THING ON??**
Calm, calm, calm...

Really I have nothing to bitch about at the moment, I'm just pondering Saturday night, as I have since it happened. I was at Tau Delta, a social co-ed fraternity, as I always am on Sat., and got horribly drunk. I was trying to kill the pain of an arthritis attack and though the pain went away, I was still in misery because I would have been lucky to have remembered my own name after smashing my own tolerance boundary three times over. A lovely nonwelcome visitor, in the form of drunk members of another nearby frat, came and the brothers barred the little sisters inside the house and sent home the guests in case of trouble (I'm not sure what you've heard about frats, but this one has its roots in fun AND chivalry). Before my poor drunk self was half-carried to a car, I received an incredible surprise. Not only did the object of my affection remember that my birthday is this coming Saturday, but that he said that he would have a gift for me!!! I was floored. 19 is no milestone in the US, unlike in Canada (you lucky bastards) so I didn't think that this was going to be a great birthday, but after having learned that PLUS the fact that my best friend from home might come to my college and visit me, well, it's looking brighter!!

I love my fish, Crackhead, and I hate my roommate, Jennifer. And I believe that it's way past my bedtime, seeing as how I'm 3 hours ahead of you lucky people.

Goodnight....a bient�t!!
I have now become an offical member of the slurrey.com squad! Don't worry i won't let you guys down!

Sunday, April 01, 2001

My Friends,

Recently I have been informed that some of the people who attended that "party" that we so gracefully crashed las week have visited our wonderous site! I would like to extend my warmest welcome to them and hope that they become frequent visitors. Oh and just because you are under the legal drinking age doesn't mean that someone can't buy for you!

Have a great time

Vice President M.C. Rae

**Vice President M.C. Rae does not condone the consumption of alcoholic beverages by those under the legal drinking age in your home province, state, or prefecture.
If you haven't seen the movie "Requiem for a Dream", be sure to watch it when it come out on video. It's a fucking masterpiece. If they showed this in CAPP class instead of those lame anti-drug videos, a hell of a lot of kids wouldn't even smoke a doobie for the rest of their lives. It's one nicely disturbing movie.
Hey listen to the new background broadcast we have on this site. It should be updated every week with new news, commercials, and SKEEF SONGS!!!

Skeef is a songwrited. The song playing on there was made in only an hour, and used a theme from the Ducktales NES game as the background music. Skeef will be using original music soon. Soon will have a Skeef's Songs section where you can download all his songs.
SHITTING FUCK!!!!
Daylight savings... what the hell is with that? I don't fucking care if I get an extra hour of sunlight if it's going to fuck up my biological clock for the next two weeks!! Yes every fucking morning will feel like I'm getting up an hour earlier. The thing that bothers me is that there's no real use for daylight saving time... it was implemented by some faggot railroad guy back in the early 1900's. They tried it in the US but it was so unpopular, they didn't introduce it until WW2, and kept it for some reason.

World War 2?? If we don't need it anymore why the ratpiss are we still using it? Are we fighting any major fucking war? It's not like we'll need it during World War 3, cause the entire planet will be nuked in about 20 fuckin minutes.I don't think an hour is gonna matter fuck all in that situation. Fucking fucksticks!

And you know what? The buses and Skytrain have just gone on strike!! So I'll really have to get up an hour early, and with the daylight savings shit, it'll seem like waking 2 hours early to go to work!! SHIT ON ME!!! Fuck!
YES YES FUCKIN YES!!!!
The stinky bitch Jerri finally got kicked oout of Survivor! Alright! I think that Survivor is gonna be a lot easier to watch from now on. That ugly ratface... doesn't she look like Skeletor from 'Masters of the Universe'? Damn, and to think that it was almost a tie between her and good ole fuckable Elisabeth. If Elisabeth would have gotten voted off before Jerri, then I the show would be unbalanced as in... "Why the fuck watch the show if there's hardly any hot chick on it, and I have to hear horny old bitch be her annoying self?"

Fuck that shit man.
Holy Flirking Shnit Batman! My first day off at my new job! Dat's right, Kink gots a real job-type thing. Money and hard labour and all that. Night Shift... gruh... 10 hours a night, 6 hours of sleep... I will very much enjoy my days off. I don't post much cuz I'm usually working or sleeping.. Plus I have Dial-Up connection (>_<) and one of the connections broke or something, but it's fixed, so I'll post more... but I've been awake for 25 hours now, and I'm gonna go zonk out for about 10 hours. I'll see ya'll later.
Till next time kiddies...