Tuesday, July 30, 2002

Well, it's reassuring that I'm not the only one here who does sick things to his computer.

SPIDERMAN WILL MAKE YOU GAY (Thanks Molly)

In other news, I think the pope has signed my guestbook. Oh and Dagimp linked me.

Monday, July 29, 2002

Q. Who is the most popular man in a nudist colony?
A. The one who can carry 2 cups of coffee and nine doughnuts at the same time.

Q. Who is the most popular woman in a nudist colony?
A. The one who can eat the last doughnut.
Mike asked this question a few posts ago... " have you ever had the urge to slap your dick across the key board", well, I must say... I have! The other night i was looking at pics of Bill Clinton while eating cottage cheese with a fork. Well, I just don't know what came over me... I had the biggest urge in the world to pull out my dick (even though, it's invisible) and slap it across the key board. It's like the picture started talking to me... it asked me "who's your daddy..." and I said, "you bill clinton, you're my daddy". AND... Ever since that night... I've been smaking my dick across the key board.. For some reason.. there just comes pleasure hearing the sound the key board makes every time my dick colides into it... it's almost like my key board is moaning for more.
I went and saw Minority Report last night!
It was a good movie all right, but one thing left me wondering... how did Mr. Anderton hang on the back of a fucking rocket pack WITHOUT GETTING HIS NUTS BURNED OFF?!?!

And was it just me or did some parts of the movie look like a bad acid trip? Shit being too bright, camera man shaking the camera around as if he's jerking off with his other hand... and the holograms look like shit. But the movie still rocked.

My video camera is still fucked up. Not literally though, I never was really attracted to it that much. I'll probably have to buy a new one. Licker of ass cheek.

Sunday, July 28, 2002

guess whos back!

ITS ME FUCKERS!@#$
Wow, I got another fansign! Thanks Leane!

I'm fucking jizzed off about my video camera getting fucked up. I brought it to Greece cause my mom wanted to use it to record my cousin's wedding. So when we were leaving Greece, she packed it into the suitcase herself. Now, I don't know just HOW she packed it, but I'm assuming that she must have thrown it from across the room into the suitcase like a football. Cause when I took it out when I got back home, it has cracks all over it. I plugged it in, didn't work or anything. FUCK! I spent $300 bucks on that thing, and I also used it as my webcam. Now I have to use that $10 dildo-shaped webcam that my computer can hardly ever detect half the time. I find that piece of crap more useful for inserting into the rectum when extremely bored. Fucking garbage.

So tomorrow I'm probably gonna take the video camera in to see if I can get it repaired. I tried to repair it, but my idea of repairing things involves a baseball bat and gasoline... and that didn't go over too well.

How do you spell strap-on backwards? NO-PARTS


(Thanks Eric)
Sometimes I feel the urge to SLAP THE KEYBOARD WITH MY DICK. Anyone ever feel that urge? Like seriously, when the fans in the computer start making weird groaning noises, and everyone thinks that the stupid fucking box in the corner of my room is in heat, it tends to get rather annoying. There are times when I wake up in the middle of the night to the noise of NRRRR NRRRNNNRN RRRRrrrrrrRRRR (sputter sputter clunk clunk).

My computer makes a lot of noise. I make even more noise telling it to "SHUT THE FUCK UP". It continues making that stupid noise...... I get up, whip out my dick, and piss on the fucker. As the piss hits the fan, it sprays all over the inside of the computer like a water sprinkler, causing sparks to fly and piss to land all over me. In a rage, I pick it up and bodyslam it on the floor, then defecate right on the CPU (I'd hope that the fans stopped spinning by now). VICTOLY!

Ok maybe that didn't happen, but I wish I could somehow shut it up. It's doing it right now actually... FUCKING QUIT MAKING NOISE YOU KNOB-GOBBLING CUM BUBBLE!!!

The only solution it seems, it to get new fans. Their "ball bearings" have gone to shit. At a cost of $10 for the big black ones, and $50 for the cpu one, and I'll probably have to get a new power supply since thee fan in that is nearly gon. Total will probably be over $150 bucks. Suddenly, the thought of fucking my computer in the ASS instead seems a lot more feasible.

If anyone has any spare fans sitting arouns, GIVE THEM TO ME!!!

Saturday, July 27, 2002

PICTURES FROM GREECE



Holy fucking shit! Make sure you either A) have a fast modem, or B) have no fucking life before clicking on that link. Why? Cause there's 2130 pictures in there, all on 51 pages of thumbnails. If that's not crazy enough, these take up 700 MB of server space.

Kinds of pics include:

    - scenery pics
    - a pic of a cat licking another cat's ass
    - different types of animals (notice how half of them are found WHERE I FUCKING SLEPT??)
    - flies having sex
    - nice beaches
    - sunsets
    - ruins and shit
    - relatives
    - weird greece shit you won't see anywhere else
    - HOT GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!iiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!!iiiiii!!!iii!!
    - Aerial views of Surrey/Vancouver from the airplane

Friday, July 26, 2002

I HAVE RETURNED!!!!

After spending 16 hours flying in fucking planes, I finally got back from Greece. The plane trips were hell, I hadn't slept the night before I went to leave Greece, so I could sleep on the plane and not be bored to deeath. But I didn't sleep much on the planes either! I took 3 planes, one from Hania to Athens, another from Athens to Amsterdam, and a gruelling 10 hour flight from Amsterdam to Vancouver! Fuuuuuck man!

So I get home, and see that my house hasn't burnt to the ground. That was a good sign. The lawn was mowed and there were no newspapers piling up outside. Someone has been taking care of the place! I get inside, and the house is a FUCKING MESS!!!! My dad and my other 2 brothers had literally turned it into a zoo, I was afraid to move anything big, knowing the kinds of things that have been left growing in here for 2 months!

I unlock my room, and it looked so strange and unfamiliar. Wow! My computer (the server that crashed while I was away) was off. Bad sign, the computer doesn't turn itself off unless it's something really serious! I turn it on, nothing comes up on the screen. I reset it, and it tries to start up, but gives a disk error. I take off the case and blow into the computer's guts, sending dust, spiders, and a couple of snakes flying into the air. It starts up after that pretty nice!

I plug my laptop in, but it looks like my AC cord for it got FUCKED, as the compute didn't detect a power source at all. With only half an hour of battery left, I transferred all the Greece pics to my main computer, and then my laptop died forever (well, untill I get a new ac adapter for it, probably that WILL take forever).

My video camera, which I used for my webcam too, got crushed in the luggage. The way my mom packed it with the other shit, it got squeezed between 2 hard things and now it doesn't even turn on anymore! Fuck I'll have to try and fix it today!

Then my email, mike@slurrey.com doesn't work anymore. Tittyfuck.

Ashlee came over and we went to the beach. I got brown ice cream all over my pants, it looked like I had finished a long session of fudge packing. We went back home, I showed her the pics I took in Greece, we watched a movie while eating pizza (I hadn't eaten Panago for such a long time, yum!), and she left at like 4 AM!!!!!!!!!!!! Crazy girl. I wasn't much tired anymore cause my retarded biological clock thought I was still in Greece, and it was 2 pm there!

I went straight to bed, and slept like a fucking crazy motherfucker! Sleeping in my own bed for the first time in 2 months was GREAT!!!!

I got a lot more to say, but I'm so tired! What will happen to Slurrey? Stay tuned fuckers, I'll get to that later, I have so much to do today! AAAH fuck!

Saturday, July 13, 2002

Tuesday, July 09, 2002

Considering I've tried posting on MiKE's payge before and it didn't work I'm not sure if this even will goddamnit...anyways wutever yaye lol MiKE's coming back soon so that's good!! *CRICKETS* (inside joke hahahahahaha) anyways most of you people don't know who the fuck i am anyways and probably don't care so I'll make this short and sweet ;) YAYE IM TURNING 17 tommoroww! lol!!!! well buh bye :p