Saturday, August 31, 2002

The Harry Potter Nimbus 2000 Broom

Here we have a toy for kids, based on the movie "Harry Potter". It's a broom, and kids put it between their legs and pretend they're flying around. The funny thing is, it makes sound effects... and VIBRATES. What's even funnier, is the user reviews on that site, here's a few samples:

"I recently bought this for my son, Vantro. He's a HUGE Harry Potter fan. Seen the movie 32 times (in the theaters) and made the paper. This toy gives him the ability to fly around the house zapping things. My only problem I see with the toy is the batteries drain too fast and his sister fights him over it, so now I need to buy her one."

"When my 12 year old daughter asked for this for her birthday, I kind of wondered if she was too old for it, but she seems to LOVE it. Her friends love it too! They play for hours in her bedroom with this great toy. They really seem to like the special effects it offers (the sound effects and vibrating). My oldest daughter (17) really likes it too! I reccomend this for all children."

"My 12 year old daughter is a big Harry Potter fan, and loved the part with the Nimbus 2000, so I decided to buy her this toy. I was afraid she would think it was too babyish, but she LOVES this toy. Even my daughter's friends enjoy playing with this fun toy. I was surprised at how long they can just sit in her room and play with this magic broomstick! A great buy for any Harry Potter fan! :) "

"This toy was #1 on my daughter's Christmas list. So what the heck, although it has no educational value I figured it would be good for imaginative play. It wasn't until after she opened her gift and started playing with it that I realized that the toy may offer a more than sensational experience. The broomstick has cute sound effects and ***VIBRATES*** when they put it between their legs to fly. Come on---what were the creators of this toy thinking? She'll keep playing with the Nimbus 2000, but with the batteries removed."
I got this in my email today:

From : ""
To : ""
Date : Sat, 31 Aug 2002 14:17:43 -0700

We have incest of all kinds:

Daddy - Daughter,
Mommy - Son,
Mommy - Daughter,
Brother - Sister,
Sister - Sister,
Daddy - Son,
Brother - Brother...

Just take a private anonimous tour!
Our content is absolutely real, no doubt
(for 100%!!!): Shocking Family Photos, Black
and White Retro Photos Content, HOT incest
Movie Clips, Incest Family Stories and more.

My Daddy is a real sexual monster... He can fuck me 5-6 times a day... And his crazy brother always draw me and my daddy. In the beginning I didn't like that, but then I felt myself pleased.

Gotta love the spam... at least now they're getting more creative.

Friday, August 30, 2002

I got 2 new fansigns from Mya!!! Check them out:

I've removed the rating system, because it broke while switching hosts, and also I'm the only one who posts here so there's really no point. I might bring it back after the staff re-hiring though.

Staff rehiring? Huh?

I've removed everyone from the staff. Don't worry you're not really fired or anything. If you want to come back to Slurrey, just say so and I'll add you back to the blogger. But you also have to actually start posting every now and then!
l1ckmy5hl0ng: :P
l1ckmy5hl0ng: :p:P:P:P:P
I am Slurrey Guy: hey
I am Slurrey Guy: do i know you?
l1ckmy5hl0ng: i dont know
l1ckmy5hl0ng: do you?
I am Slurrey Guy: hmmmm
I am Slurrey Guy: "lick my shlong" sounds like a name I'D use
l1ckmy5hl0ng: maybe im you
I am Slurrey Guy: :Q
I am Slurrey Guy: you're messin with my mind man
I am Slurrey Guy: and you don't have much to mess with either
l1ckmy5hl0ng: or you may be messing with mine
l1ckmy5hl0ng: your own
l1ckmy5hl0ng: who knows
I am Slurrey Guy: :F
l1ckmy5hl0ng: :P
I am Slurrey Guy: i am pissing my pants in fear right now
I am Slurrey Guy: so, if you're me
I am Slurrey Guy: go change your pants
l1ckmy5hl0ng: i cant my 72'er gets in the way
I am Slurrey Guy: you must detach it
I am Slurrey Guy: geeez i thought you knew these things
I am Slurrey Guy: I'm stupider than I thought
l1ckmy5hl0ng: damn velcrow

Well I figured out that it was just Mya, trying to fuck with my head. I think she even did it again last night!

Thanks to this awesome host, Slurrey is now alive and kickin'! Go and check them out!

That's all the updating for today, I'm goin to sleep cause I'm FUCKING tired. Later 'baters!
TESTES, TESTES, 1.. 2... 3?!?!? Where'd I grow the extra one?!

Wednesday, August 28, 2002

Sorry for the lack of updates. Oh wait why the fuck am I apologizing, it's my site I can update it whenever I want!!!

Lately I've been trying to find hosting... hence the lack of updates. There have been many offers for hosting, but they either fell through, or they didn't get back to me, or were warned by their lawyer not to (LOL!). Shitty deal! There's a good chance Emilea can host me, well, that's if I'm allowed to actually use my domain. Go to her site, she's an EXCELLENT writer, and it's full of good readin'. Much <3 to her.

I got an email from my ISP regarding their acceptable uses policy, or rather me breaking it. From my connection at home I have been uploading over 500 MB a day. So I had to take down some shit, such as the MP3's, the porn gallery, the WTC attack gallery, and I had to reduce the size of all 2100 pics from my trip to greece to 640x480 (they were originally 1280x960). You can still find the 1280x960 pics in there though, I set up an alternate directory for them. They're just harder to browse through.

I'm going back to BCIT this year, and I have a feeling I'll do a hell of a lot better than last year. Not that I ended up doing that bad... I'm still in shock I passed all the courses I was sure I was going to fail. Did the good karma finally kick in? Maybe!

Watch for quite a few field trips up on slurrey soon, gotta end the summer with a bang. For now, I must concentrate on my hosting woes and other stuff. Oh and to the flamers who have nothing better to do than post mean comments and steal pink hats, I'd say "FUCK YOUR LIVES" too, but apparently you don't have any to fuck. Goodday!

Monday, August 26, 2002

Last night was pretty damn good! Went over to Ashlee's, saw pictures from her vacation and stuff. I never did end up eating anything, but we did go to Tim Hortons and I had one of those ICY coffees. I think it was an iced cappuchino or something like that. IT WAS GOOD.

Wow, was I in for a surprise this morning. For the first time in like 3 days I can finally completely close my mouth again. Fucking wisdom teeth!! So anyways I had to get up early cause I had another appointmeent with the guy who ripped out my teeth in the first place. He said it was for a "check up" or something like that. Now if I had known that his idea of a "check up" is to violently tear out all the stitches, then SCRAPE out the blood clots from the holes where my teeth used to be, and then STUFF GAUZE laced with this disgusting-tasting medicine stuff into them, I probably WOULDN'T HAVE FUCKING GONE. Like seriously, the pain from losing my wisdom teeth had just gone away, and the second I step in there I'm nearly flipping in the fucking chair from the shit he's doing! Like what the fuck, I have a high pain tolerance, but this was nuts!

Then I went to Cash Converters, which was pretty much next door. I bought a new video camera today. You might remember that my old one got crushed in the suitcase when I was coming back from Greece, my mom was the one who packed it. When I got into a store, I see a video camera EXACTLY the same as my old one, except it came with no video cables. It cost $140, which is pretty good considering I paid $299 FOR THE SAME DAMN THING A YEAR AGO!!!

Time to start filming some more crazy shit again. OH YEAH AND SLURREY STILL NEEDS HOSTING!!! HALP!!!

Sunday, August 25, 2002

Well, day two of the bitchin concert rocked.
(Im more organised with this installment of Pat's Snow Jam Review)

Band reviews:(in order)
Local bands to start with,
WDC: Awesome band, woulda bought their CD but was out of money, great punk sound and some nice songs.
PepperSands: Great band, very punk, ABSOLUTE HOTTIE lead singer, she was sooooo hot, and the music is good too, Kinda like Bif Naked in that regard.
HoneySuckle Serontina: Good sound, although the lead singer had funny(feminine) ways of standing. Overall though, not too bad, the music was a little bit bland though
Moka Only: Hated, just wandered away and ran into an old friend, had some fun sitting a ways away talking for a while.
Closure: Very repetitive, too much lead guitar that wasnt even that great, the only upshot to the band was a good strong drummer.
Dropkick Murphys: The fucking reason I bought tickets, I love this band, these guys are gods of punk and a lot of good punks came out decked out in mohawks and chains to support the band. Everything I expected and more, they played most of my favourite songs, I got to see SPICY!!! That guy rocks! The stage presense of that band is phenomenal, they throw it all into it and got as sweaty as those of us in the pit. Spicy rocked!!! This band was the highlight of the weekend, by far the best band in my opinion, the just rocked.
Swollen Members: Hated, they realy sucked, they had a big argument on stage with one another over what song to play last, ended up playing their big hit AGAIN, they played the same song twice in the same show! Thats crap.
Pennywise: I used to realy like Pennywise, then I got into some better music. Not to say Pennywise doesnt rock in their own right, I just think that their are much better bands out their and that maybe the band whent farther than they should have given their talent. The audience was great for this group, one huge mosh. They got a HUGE circle pit going which realy rocked, although I had a guy slam into me who had decided that he wanted to go the opposite way and hurl himself at those that went "the wrong way" that gave me a bleeding elbow but it was all good, he was out of my sight before I was standing again. They played Brohym last, my favourite song by them, it just rocked.

Well, Snow Jam 2002 was ok, although Im dissapointed in the band lineup after last years star studded event with Sloan, Shocore, Treble Charger, Matthew Good Band, Bif Naked and more, also dissapointed in the lack of free food that was prevalent last year, oh well, free Mountain Dew slurpees yum. Also as with last year, free condoms so Im stocked up for a while.

I could go on but I wont since Ive already taken up huge amounts of space, hey Mike, if ya dont want me to post just say so.

Saturday, August 24, 2002

Slurrey was officially 2 years old about a week or two ago. Isn't that amazing? For 2 years Slurrey has meen making a dent in the internet community. While there are far better and far worse sites out there, not many of them have been around for that long. Usually, people just get tired of internet shit and give up their sites. Not with slurrey! Even with the 3+ GB of stuff available to download off here, it's almost always been up for download. There were exceptions like when my hard drive crashed, or I went to Greece and my computer overheated, but things were back up and running ASAP!

Slurrey has been through a lot of changes throughout this whole time. Different staff members, different layouts (though I don't change layouts more often than I update, like Karyn does), and different kinds of content all together. If you go and look through the news archives from long ago, you could probably see how much I've changed. Gone are the stupid quotes like "My dick is limp and dying! Somebody perform CPR on it quick!", and my adventures with my "72 foot long penis". Some people say they enjoyed that crazy shit. I find it hard to believe, but maybe I should start talking about dumb shit like that again, at least for the entertainment value.

In a couple of days the hosting for this site goes away, and I still haven't found anyone else to host Slurrey. What's gonna happen now? Well, I'll keep trying to look for someone to host me, but I don't know if I can find a host that soon.

Does anyone remember the Slurrey Shows? I found a few of them, and encoded them in DiVX. There's also some never-before-seen shit, like communism video. Funny stuff indeed, once I get my video camera working again, there will be new slurrey shows filmed!

Check them out here!
Wow, Im actualy posting! Yay for me.

So I just got back from the first day of Snow Jam. Man I got sunburned, frigging hot day. Bands overall were pretty good, though "rascalz" were total crap that I walked away from and 54-40 wasnt that great, though Unwritten Law totaly rocked.

HOTTIES EVERYWHERE, thats all I can say, and ALL the chicks working there were fucking amazingly hot.

Met a total hottie today, of course it was my friend who got her to hang out with us, damn I hate that. Were going to meet up with her again tomorow.

Tomorow's bands include:
Dropkick Murphy's

and unfortunately, Moka Only and Swollen Members.

Well thats all for me!

Friday, August 23, 2002

If somebody doesn't host slurrey soon, it'll be gone for a while.

Can YOU host me? All slurrey needs is 10 MB of space, PHP, no banners, FTP, and NO CENSORSHIP (not like there's anything illegal on here but freedom of speech is important). HELP!!! Leeave a comment if you can help!
Well yesterday i had 4 wisdom teeth removed. They put me to sleep, and that was probably the funnest part of the whole thing. As the guy was pumping my arm with this white sleep anesthetic, I started to get dizzy, everything felt fuzzy and weird, and I blacked out. I guess that's what dying from a lethal injection feels like, except you don't wake up. There hadn't come out yet, so that had to cut open my gums in 4 placees and dig them out. In the lower right corner of my mouth, that wisdom tooth was growing in a really wierd place so cut there was freaking huge.

When I woke up from the anesthetic in what seemed like minutes later, I felt really dizzy and said I couldn't feel my mouth. The nurse said "that's cause we cut off your hands" or something like that. Har har. I was drooling into a plate and she asked me to rinse my mouth out. As you could imagine, it was quite difficult considering I couldn't even feel where my mouth was. The first time I tried it, the water ran straight down my face. It must have been hilarious to anyone watching, but (un)fortunately no one was in the room.

I went home, watched TV for a bit, everything seemed fine, it was just swollen and painful, but not too bad...then suddenly everything started going to shit. It started to hurt a LOT, and I didn't know that it would hurt this much but it felt like the inside of my mouth was a giant throbbing mass of pain. Then in the next 35 minutes my face swelled up to twice it's size, and I couldn't open or close my mouth. Like, my cheeks on the inside had swollen between all my teeth. Then I lost the ability to swallow (har har again) and the bloody spit that I tried to swallow only came back out my mouth. Things then got even worse. The swelling moved down my throat, and breathing started being a lot harder than I used to remember it. Then it was pretty obviousthat something had gone wrong, I couldn't even take my pills. An hour later it hadn't gotten any worse, and I had figured out how to take my pills by pushing them with my finger all the way to the back of my throat, which is a lot harder than it sounds. I took 2 tylenol 3's, which was enough for me to be able to deal with the pain eenough to sleep.

I woke up this morning feeling a ton better than last night, and I look into the mirror and open my mouth, and th einside was all covered in huge cuts, apparently from being frozen and not knowing when I was chewing the inside of my mouth all to shits.

I'm glad I didn't have to do this shit ever again. Having a string of bloody drool going from my mouth to a McDonald's cup isn't my idea of fun.

The bad reaction I got last night, I think it was either from the medicine I was taking cause I wasn't used to it, or the fact that I had chewed up the inside of my mouth so bad. But I seem to be ok now!

Sunday, August 18, 2002

FIELD TRIP #32 PICS!!!!!!!!!

Last night was a fun night. We went to Richelle's birthday party at the Douglas Rec Centre, where a bunch of bands played.

So anyways, Leane, Lindsey, and Alicia show up at my house an hour early, and we sat around doing nothing for a while. Then we left and went down to the Skytrain station, and there I realized how much of a tard I was cause I forgot the directions on how to get there at home. We were gonna go back, but the "Aah fuck it" factor kicked in and we just got on the Skytrain, hopeful that we could ask people how we could get to the middle of nowhere.

Well I remembered that we had to get off at the burned value village, so we got off there and sorta wondered around until we came to this huge map. Well, that sorta helped. When we got to Douglas Rec Centre, there were a bunch of people standing out there and I had no clue who Richelle was (the only pic she sent me was a year old). Then, suddenly this HOT HOT blonde chick walks up to me and asks if I'm Mike, and I'm like "yup" while wondering who she was. It took my braincell-challenged brain a few seconds to figure out that it was Richelle! COOL!!

So Lindsey, Alicia, and Leanne say they're really hungry. Wo go to some Chinese restaurant, but me and Alicia don't like chinese food so we didn't eat anything. We go back to the front of Douglas Rec Centre, and suddenly Lindsey and Leanne start having a spray fight and spraying each other with that stringy shit. Somehow I get involved too, and I ended up being covered in that shit. But at least I got Lindsey good.

Then bands started playing, I don't remember who played, but most of them kicked ass. One band played totally drunk, and the little drummer kid kept going up to the mic and yelling shit out, it was funny. Some guy got chunks cut out of his hair by everyone. Lindsey and Alicia were TOTALLY FUCKING WASTED, and were doing drunk things, including throwing what they thought was water at each other (which was actually lemon juice or something). It was so funny. They got thee eentire floor wet!

Well that's all I remember, if I remember anything else that happened last night I'll add it to this post!

Thursday, August 15, 2002

Barrysworld, the only host I've had for slurrey that never gave me any problems, is ending its free service in 2 weeks. Well, I guess that's a problem.

I need a new host. I know that everytime I make a post about needing a new host, no one really helps... I'm hoping that this time it's different. HELP ME FIND A NEW HOST!!!

Wednesday, August 14, 2002

I saw the movie Vanilla Sky last night... and the night before.

This is one hell of a movie. I even went back and watched it again after the first time to get all the stuff I had missed. It's sorta hard to explain what this movie's about without spoiling anything, so go and rent the DVD. The soundtrack is also really fucking good... I'm planning on buying it. Or well... downloading it. Yeah!

KARYN has moved yet AGAIN! Not only did I have to change her cam and site url, but now I have to change her friggin link button too!!! That'll only take me a couple of months to do. Man, now she changes hosts almost as often as she changes layouts! Good one Karyn!!! You're a lazy webmaster's worst nightmare...

I have to go to BCIT soon to register for my courses. I don't believe it, but I passed ALL the courses I thought I was failing last term! That's pretty fuckin sweet. BCIT isn't a regular college in case you already know. The ratio of guys to girls in the program I'm taking (CST) is quite severe. Like seriously, there were hardly any chicks in any of my classes. College parties are pretty much non-existant due to the fear of attending a "sausage party".... the next day waking up and wondering if you were the sausage or the sausagee. Well actually they do have "LAN parties" there, where people hook their laptops together and play multiplayer games. Actually, most of these "LAN parties" would happen in the middle of class. Give a bunch of students some laptops to "enhance their learning", and you're PRETTY DAMN SURE more work is gonna get done!!

Tuesday, August 13, 2002

Looks like we got a new local cam! Say hello to Heather. I've known her for almost a year and a half, and she's been on one of those old slurrey shows we used to do. Click on her webcam to go to her site. It's under construction right now, but I'm sure it will be kicking ass very soon.

Wow, I just realised I can still blog here freely!

Blogger seems to have sorta half stopped hating me and is now letting me actualy blog!!!

Rock on me!

Monday, August 12, 2002

Hoes, bitches, hoes and bitches! I don't really have anything to postright now, I'm just doing it outta pure boredom! Did anyone else notice that I seem to be the only one posting around here? Time to clean up some staff!

It ain't easy living in Surrey. As Carly once said, you can't stand go out your front door without catching the herps!

I get almost 20 hits a day from this guy. Considering how hard my link is to find on that page, he must be getting a SHITLOAD AND A HALF of hits.

This girl linked me on her site. I'm gonna add her to the permanent links section, but I'm still expecting a response from her to give me her link button.

I feel like a monkey with its dick caught in the refridgerator door right now. Don't ask me how a monkey gets his thing caught in a fridge door, I honestly try not to think about those kinda things.. unsuccessfully. AAH!!

Sunday, August 11, 2002

FIELD TRIP #31 PICS!!!!!!!!!

Me, Mike, Kevin, Ben, and Pat went to the fireworks finale. It was full of people. So anyways we tried to get over the same testicle-threatening fence from field trip #29, but there was this guard guy there now. Shitty. So we tried going around, but the crowd was getting tighter. We just stopped walking at some point and sat down.

The fireworks were ok. People were smoking up all over the place, and these chicks beside us were dissing Tool. Grrr, I wanted to fuck them in an angry kinda way. Then there was that big drunk guy behind us yelling drunken shit, it was hilarious. Every now and then he was kawking like a fucking bird, while the stoners next to us were laughing their asses off.

The best part was battling the crowd and getting the fuck outta there. It was really tight and impossible to move, and all you could do was push forward. There were even times where I didn't think my feet were touching the ground. Fuckin shit! So the crowd stops moving, and we start pushing even harder. Then when we got off the beach the crowd was even tighter, and there was this huge drunk guy pushing his way through the crowd, so we got behind him. I was trippsing over shit like curbs and baby carriages.

When the crowds got less thick, we ran all the way to the station, beating most of the people.

Then, this FUCKING TALL ASS COP gets in the Skytrain. I swear, he had to beend down to get in it! I took a picture, it was so fuckin crazy! This girl I knew off MSN told me that she knows him, and he's 7'2. HOLY FUCK. She was on the same train as us, but I didn't see her! Shitness!

Saturday, August 10, 2002

FIELD TRIP #30 PICS!!!!!!!!!

Last night involved drinking at Tony's house, and trespassing in some guy's woods. I had a raging fucking headache like never before, so I only had 3 and a half shots of some good shit I don't remember the name of it. The woods were fucking crazy, we didn't have a flashlight, only lighters, and halfway down it was steep downhill, the rest was through solid bush. We didn't do too bad, suprisingly I didn't bleed at all, but someone cut their leg open, and Mike accidentally gouged a couple of holes in his hand from his spiky wrist strap.

Well, time to head off to the last fireworks. That makes like what... 6 field trips this week?

Licker of rat cunt.... sucker of lint off of grandma's testicles.... FUUUUCK!!!!

Well I was riding home on the Skytrain. I get to my stop, get up, and walk out of the Skytrain. I instantly realize that heey... my cell is missing. Did I mention how many fucking times it fell off me when I went to the fireworks on Wednesday? It must have fallen off in the Skytrain. I turn around to go back in and get it, and the DOOR CLOSES IN MY FUCKING FACE and the Skytrain takes off!

So when I get home I try to call my number, and guess what, I gues someone found it, cause it was turned OFF. Fucking piece of shit.

So how's that for fucking karma? I find a cell phone in the middle of the street, turn it off, keep it, and now the same fucking thing happens to my own!! FUCK YOU KARMA!!! (I Know I'll get bad karma for saying that too, fucking karma. Oops I did it again).


UPDATE: I got my cell phone back. Some guy found it on the Skytrain, offered to bring it all the way back to Surrey, if I gave him a $25 reward. Fuuuuuuck but what can I do, I consider myself damn lucky!

Friday, August 09, 2002

I guess this brings new meaning to the term "homo milk". Haah.

Thursday, August 08, 2002

FIELD TRIP #29 PICS!!!!!!!!!

So many field trips in the last few days! I must have eaten oysters or something. Last night's field trips was one of the best ones ever! Ashlee was leaving for vacation the next day (today), so we had to do something more kickass than usual!! At the last minute, we went to go see the fireworks.

It was 8 pm, so we had 2 hours to get down there! We drive down to the Scott Road station, and I pay for parking. Then we go to buy the tickets... but I don't have any change on me! Only a $20 dollar bill! And the machine eonly accepts $5 or $10 bills! We go around asking random people for change for a 20, and all of them said they didn't. I bet some of them were lying. Then I get the BRILLIANT idea to go back to the parking lot ticket machines, pay for another parking, stick the $20 in, and get $19 back in loonies! IT WORKED!!! So we buy tickets and RUN up the Skytrain stairs to catch the Skytrain, and got in just in time.

The Skytrain ride was pretty fun, some cops came in and busted this guy who seemed to have alcohol in his Sprite bottle. HA HA!!

When we got to downtown Vancouver, there was such a crowd there that it was crazy. We made an elaborate plan to get ahead of the crowd by..... walking faster. When that didn't work, taking a few back alleys to avoid the crowd was considered! That got us places (lost a bit). But it was all good. I saw some kids from my old high school too, I'm sure a lot of you out there know Jacob Hoggard! What a chimp!! Haha.

Ashlee knew a special spot where we could see the fireworks really well! But to get to it, we had to climb over a fence. Now this was not a climb-able fence, it was one of those gay waist-high orange plastic meshes. We tried looking for an easier way to the other side that wouldn't involve loss of my nutsack, but alas there was no other way. It takes balls to "step over" one of those stupid half-assed fences.... because when you have one laeg over and try to get the other one over, your nuts aren't exactly in the most comfortable situation.

I climbed over the fence, doubtful I'll ever have any kids again. Then when Ashlee was about to do it, some old lady points to the corner of it and says "you can go under it you know!". I saw there was a hole there that I could have gone through, and I was like "shit bitch fuck twat tittly lick!!!!!". Anyways we go there and watch the fireworks. I didn't like them much, firworks don't really turn me on. I just like to go to them cause it's a fun trip! So yeah, all around me people were like "oooh aah" at all the flashes of light going along with the slightly gay 70's music.

Finally, they were over, and we make a mad dash to get the fuck out of there! It was harder to go faster than the crowd though, since everyone was fucking crammed together, and if you tried to go in any other direction from the flow of the crowd, you'd get trampled upon. If the crowd was going off the cliff and into the water like lemmings, everyon ein Vancouver would drown. Seriously we were packed like sardines in the streets, I unintentionally touched many hot chick's asses, but I wasn't complaining.

I noticed a strange smell, and people around me were coughing and rubbing their eyes. I heard someone say "Pepper Spray!", and a few seconds later I realized.... it was pepper spray! I guess the cops were really bored or something and decided to unleash some of that shit into the air and entertain themselves. Fucking cops!

Shlee drags me on a detour and we start running through a small street to get away from the crowd. Another elaborate plan surfaced to beat the crowd to the Skytrain station. Instead of walking faster then them, we'd RUN to the Skytrain station. So we ran, ran some more, ran even more, got tired and stopped, and ran again.

Then we got lost!!

So for like the neext half hour we were walking around trying to get un-lost, and we come across something strange. Wow, I didn't know we had one of these in Vancouver! It was some funny shit I tell ya! We ask a whole bunch of people for directions, and then we didn't follow their directions properly and got more lost, and I was taking pictures of buildings the whole time, but eventually we came to some Skytrain Station. WOOHOO!!!!! I started to feel non-retarded again!

We get on the Skytrain, and surprisingly it wasn't that crowded, we got some good seats! Unfortunately, the next station was TOTALLY crowded, and while we were going past them Shlee was laughing at them... until the train stopped and the doors opened! The Skytrains filled up like a Surrey whore after getting paid $2. There was this old guy who was sitting in the chair really close to us. Shlee decided to try and make all the people around us laugh! So everytime we got to a station, and the female voice said "The next station is...", Ashlee would repeat that over and over again in a funny voice. And yeep, the chinese people all around us were laughing. Some stops later even I joined in. The old guy across from us was looking at us like we were drug addicts or something, I'm sure we looked like we were on some crazy shit.

Then me and Shlee had an intense game of rock, paper, scissors. After a few thousand turns, Ashlee tried to get the other people around us involved too. It was fucking hilarious, we had a big giant game of rock paper scissors, and the old guy now had a really funny expression on his face. My face was hurting from laughing so much!

We get off the Skytrain, and then we're off to Boston Pizza! Shlee had to get some cash from the bank. While walking to the door with the security camera watching us, we did the "Mambo" (sp?) or whatever it was. The bored security guard must have had a laugh at the retards in front of the camera!

When we got out and danced back to the car, my cell phone fell out for the second time during the night and smashed into a million pieces. Well, it only smashed into 3, but putting it back together with a simple mind like mine, seemed like a million pieces. It still worked! Sweetass.

At BP I got a chocolate explosion and Shlee got a pizza. We talked about stuff there, and left after an hour or so and went to my place. I gave Shlee a surprise I made for her. You might remember that when I went to Greece for 2 months, she wrote me 7 letters to open for each friday I was there! That was one of the sweetest things I ever gotten. Sooo, for her 2 week trip to Scotland, I wrote her 15 letters, one to open every day! Then we listened to some music and stuff, and then I drove her to her house at like 3:30 am! The gas needle on the van was on empty, so I was hoping that I'd make it to her house and back, and luckily, I did!

It was an interesting night! Anyways Shlee, have a safe and awesome trip, I will miss you very muchly. Seeya in 2 weeks!

Coldplay - In My Place.mp3 <--- the song I heard on the way to Ashlee's, and then we downloaded it later! Really good song!
Well everyone, I'm on my way to Scotland for two weeks!! I hope you guys have a nice rest of the summer while I'm gone! Bye Slurrey!

Wednesday, August 07, 2002

FIELD TRIP #28 PICS!!!!!!!!!

A couple of nights ago, Leane, Lindsey, Alicia, and Raveen came over. They brought booze and weed and stuff, though I didn't have any of that cause alcohol still tastes gross to me after Field Trip #27. So they drink and stuff over at my place, and Lindsey and Raven seem pretty drunk/stoned/out of it.

We leave to go walk to King George skytrain station. Lindsey and Raven were trailing behind, drinking quite a bit. Then, I found a cell phone in the middle of the street! I like, risked my life grabbing it, there were no cars nearby but I seem to get hit by cars all the time, even parked ones. The cell phone still worked and stuff, and we used it to make a few phone calls. Sweet.

Somehow Lindsey and Raven, after drinking slightly too much, got trapped on the wrong side of a chain linked fence. Rather than go around, they tried to climb it. The next 15 minutes was rather hilarious, we took many pictures of their attempts! Then, they found a way around, but Raven walked off in the wrong direction. Me and Leane chased her for like 2 blocks, but she left!

We walked down to Surrey Central, and got on the skytrain to King George. Did I mention that we were 2 hours late? So when we got there, no one was there. We hung out there for a while, vandalized the locker boxes with the slurrey URL, and waited for a ride home. We were there for like an hour I think. Anyways some Izzy guy gave us a ride back, it sure beat walking!
I'm watching this stuff your face full of shit eatting contest on Sally. Woo good tv programming for 3:45am. Fucking tv likes to screw me over

yes, we all know I should be working on fixing my sleeping patterns, but yanno what? FUCK YOU :D lol

that FUCK YOU was for MiKE, because my link button hasn't changed. I'm about a day away from getting the password and changing it myself. I mean, you changed the link already, why not the button you fool. Its not that hard to go to my site, click site, right click on the button and save it on your desktop, then upload it to your server and TA-DA! DONE! Christ almighty ... IT MAKES ME SO MAD

Ok Sally's back on i gotta watch this shit ... MiKE I HATE YOU! :D

Sunday, August 04, 2002

FIELD TRIP #27 PICS!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday was the party. I went there, and my hair didn't come back.

Anyways I met Mya, Mike, and Kevin at Gateway, and then went to buy some liquor at the liquor store. It appeared that everyone had started drinking early! I only had $10 I was able to spend, so I bought a small bottle of good ole Jack Daniels. We go back to Tony's house, and I have some beer and then start taking shots of JD. It wasn't long before I finished the entire thing. After that, the night became a blur. A pretty fuckin fun blur. Suddenly, I hear the sound of a electric shaver, and I get grabbed.

Oh shit.

I think I put up a really good fight, but I was definitely outnumbered. Minutes later I was sitting there with my hair in my hands, and my brain feeling colder than it usually does. Well, my head is now totally shaved. They had to do it twice though, cause the first time everyone was drunk and big chunks of my hair were still there.

So after that, I puke somewhere, then 2 hours of stuff happened that I don't remember, and then I pass out on the couch at 2 am. Fucking crazy shit. Then I wake up this morning, and feel my head.... and uh oh, it wasn't a dream. MY HAIR'S ALL FUCKIN GONE MAN!!!! I'm sure it'll grow back soon. I was pretty surprised though, all the scars were pretty much gone! Well last time I shaved my head was when I was like 10, so uhhh, cool!

That was one hell of a party! Go to Pheends for more party pics when they're up!

Friday, August 02, 2002


Twelve Boston priests were about to be ordained. Their final test was for them to line up in a straight row, totally nude, in a garden while a sexy and beautiful, big breasted, nude model danced before them.

Each priest had a small bell attached to his penis and they were told that anyone whose bell rang when she danced in front of them would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of spiritual purity. The beautiful model danced before the first candidate, with no reaction. She danced before the second with no reaction. She proceeded down the line with the same response from all the priests until she got to the last of the group. As she danced, his bell began to ring so loudly that it flew off and fell clattering to the ground!!!

Embarrassed, he took a few steps forward, bent over to pick it up and..... set off all the other bells.
Oh my oh my?! I still have rights to blog :D :D :D

MUWAHAHAHA IM GONNA TAKE OVER SLURREY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Read MiKE's waste of space quotes. Some are actually good. not like this shit im writing.




"If anyone wants to buy a 256 MB Ram stick off me, I'm selling it for $75 Cdn. May or may not have been previously passed throungh in a bowel movement."

"Those damn semen taste-testers"

"But before I leave, let me share a thought with you. Don't swat bugs, especially flies with your bare hands. Those fuckers have probably been in quite a few feces and carcassess, and are probably quite dirty. So I'd be pretty reluctant to swat them with any part of my body."

"Now send us beer, money, and clean vagina (preferably with a hot chick attached to it)."

"Cocksucking ICQ. If ICQ could suck cocks, everyone out there with a penis would be feeling extremely satisfied right now."

"There was such a high ratio of quality pussy that I (or my pants?) could hardly contain my excitement. Now I know that I won't get lost at SFU I can always follow the trail of drool to retrace my steps. A plethora of ass, titties, ass and titties."

"Shit man all these fuckable chicks at a university and me with only one penis"

"Yeah all that studying requires a good source of Vitamin Rubber. "

"Fucks sake, until mid-december my life will consist of eat, sleep, spank it with my goat, and study. ...oh wait, I just remembered I don't have a goat. Life sucks."

"Ever had to take a shit during the most inopportune moment? There's nothing worse than needing to exorcise the big brown demon(s) from your ass, and not having a nice, white, porcelain priest to do the job. Today I was at work, and I suddenly had the urge to take a shit. Now everyone knows how horrible the toilets are at work, so I run over there, open the toilet lid... and see a pyramid of shit inside there that rivals the pyramids in egypt and on Pamela Anderson's chest, in massiveness. Normally something that scary scares the shit out of people, but a sight like this scared the shit back INTO me!!! Fuck that was gross."

"What we have here is a fine example of what happens when retards are bred with monkeys. Sir, your farts smell like fish, you masterbate to pictures of your parents wedding, you give your little sister ATD's (Anal Tongue Darts), you suck your dog off, your dad rapes you with a shovel, your grandpa rapes you with his semen-crusted cane, and your mom rapes you with that frozen fish she always has stuck halfway up her ass.
Because your mom has not tits cause she was once a man (she couldn't afford to get the FULL sex change operation) she got your dad to cram his dick in your mouth... but I guess it was a little too big and it shot a load of semen into your brain cavity, which is now your brain. Thus causing your fucking lameness. So now you know.
Have a nice day! "

"Witnesses said that the puke came out of my mouth in a parabolic arc, and landed on the floor right in front of me."

"When I heard the news i nearly shit myself repeatedly... yeah call it multiple shitgasms"

"I am convinced I was dropped as a baby. Off a three storey building."

"I just wish I was holding a big fish so I could smack that bitch upside the head with it."

"My only complaint was the fucking seats at the theatre. They were so bad, I had to take out my wallet and put it in my front pocket or it would leave a permanent rectangular groove in my ass."

"Oh my god the toilet next to my room flushed by itself, for no reason whatsoever. Wow."

"My digital camera must have been a very loose street whore in its previous life. It sucks 4 AA batteries in under 15 minutes. "

"Frankly, I'd rather lick a poodle's ass for 12 straight hours rather than work in the rain. "

"I hate my 72 foot long penis."

"Fuck, everyone knows what is being said anyways, so what is the point of censorship? To protect the over-sensetive fairies who will shrivel up and die if they hear any vulgarity??? "

"Ever had to take a shit in a portable john that hasn't been cleaned in 3 weeks? I bet the stink from that thing knocked out my sense of smell for the rest of my life. Fuck, I'd rather pinch a loaf in the middle of a busy street."

"Notice how the mouse does not function without its ball. Well I'm sure I wouldn't function without my nuts either."

"Inside, there was a massive turd, rotating in the corner. I'm serious it must have been 2 feet long! And it was fucking rotating for no reason at all. And the smell.... I was afraid my face would peel off from the noxious fumes coming from the john. It's scarred me for life."

"I've decided to utilise webcam technology to let people see what my life is like. Basically you can watch me look at animal porn, eat keys from my computer's keyboard, and scratch my nuts, without actually having to go within a 10 foot radius of me and risk catching retarditis."

"sux0r my dix0r"

"He's dead man, you don't have to keep poking him like that.""

"I shit you not, the highlight of this movie was when some guy's cell phone in the seat in front of us rang for the 5th time. **** starts bitching at him, and some guy in the back row yells: "TURN OFF YOUR FUCKIN CELL PHONE YOU MORON!!!" and I almost got up and defecated in the middle of the theater. I didn't really care that the guy's cell phone was ringing, I was hoping it would ring some more, so a fight would break out in the theater and we'd have something actually entertaining to watch."

"I once swallowed a bottle cap. Shitting that thing out was a very deep and meaningful experience."

"I have noticed that my floppy disk drive has stopped working. What the fuck. I guess I shouldn't have jammed my disk in it so hard every day."

"Another thing that pisses me off is gimps who leave the toilet seat down and then piss all over it. It's like they were having a seizure or something while urinating, causing them to drench the entire seat in fucking piss."

"To this very day, I still have nightmares about that rotating 2 foot long turd I saw inside the Jiffy John. Damn it.

"Sorry for not being able to update the page yesterday, I have been too busy polishing my cock."

"Now I'm going to bed... counting how many sheep i'm going to fuck tomorrow. "

"My girlfriend is very violent. I am still looking for my penis."

"I'm so cool I scare the fuck out of myself sometimes. "

"There is a dead rat at work and I accidentally keep stepping on it. Well, ok maybe after I step on it I turn around and step on it again for fun, but it's really addictive and I can't stop doing it."

"Next time I see a Furby I will stick it up my ass, shit it out, and repeat the process several times."

"I looked into the toilet and there was this HUGE fucking turd in there!! I fucking swear, it must have been around 12 inches long and 2 and a half inches wide. I was like "ewww fucking sick" so I tried to flush it. While the toilet was flushing, all the turd did was spin around in there, leaving skid marks on the inside of the bowl. Sick! It looked like it was too big to go down the hole (reminds me of sex for some reason) so I ended up taking the plunger and breaking up that monster turd into smaller pieces. It was a gruesome task, but somebody had to do it (knowing the people I live with, that turd would have been sitting there for another 30 years)."

"Today when I woke up I saw that this was written on my dick: "Stop beating me". Don't look at me, I'm just as puzzled by this.."

"After watching the new show "Dark Angel", I have *come* to the conclusion that I want to fuck every hole in Jessica Alba's body for 3 weeks straight until my penis is worn down to a half-inch stub."

"My cable modem smells like fish. Um."

"I can't even surf the internet properly anymore. My connection keeps getting raped about 300 times a day. My conversation with some random chick about hairy nipples was cut short when my @home connection died. God damnit, I was in the middle of this very deep conversation and suddenly it's over because the good ole boys at @home were having sex with the server hub a little bit too rough. God damnit, when I'm on the phone, the line doesn't just suddenly go dead! That's cause my phone company has actual human beings working for it, not some chimpanzees who's idea of system maintenace is beating the keyboards with their chimp dicks."

"@home. My ass has better bandwidth than their cable lines."

"Well this is a fine example of evolution... bird have evolved to make their shit harder to see so they can defecate on more people. I wish my shit was neon green. Oh wait, it already is. I guess I shouldn't spend so much time in front of the computer. Nah."

"Do you have intelligent conversations with your anus after enjoying a bowel movement? Welcome to my life."

"Have you ever went to take a monster shit and left very little in the toilet bowl... which was pretty unsatisfying? Well this is what this website is like."


"Sega should have called their system the "Porncast". "

"Most likely I'll be passed out drunk in my Pikachu costume in the middle of the street, while little kids shoot firecrackers at me. Halloween is so damn cool."

"At work now it gets dark at the end of the day and I am fumbling around the site in darkness, running into things and getting stabbed with pieces of reinforcing steel bars. I am still bleeding in 167 different places as I write this."

" A couple of hours later, I still was unable to log on. Pissed off as hell, I unzipped my pants to jizz on the computer, then suddenly ICQ started working again. Nothing works better than the sound of the fly goin down."

"Oh and some guy set up quite a few live cameras in his house. You can watch him eat, sleep, feed the girlfriend and fuck the cat. There is also a chat room thingy beside the live camera player so you can chat to him and he'll tell you to fuck off."

"Oh how I wish I was back in elementary school writing these things. My teacher always used to send me in for psychiatric evaluations and I got to miss part of class."

"I am sitting here listening to am MP3 while doing some Photoshop editing, and everytime I apply any special effects, Winamp emits a heavy FARTING sound. Since when did computer programs start making bodily function noises? Thank Artificial Intelligence for that. Soon computers will be taunting us, and taking shits in our toilets. "

"There once was a guy named Booger, who liked to stick small animals up his butt. One day he decided to stick a rat infected with rabies up his butt, so he threw the rat into his ass (he also had a fetish for shoving hockey sticks in there, thus making his asshole quite large). Then, the rat bit him on the inside of his ass and took a shit in there. Booger screamed in pain, and later on that day he pooped out rat poop, and his wife (she had a penis) made fun of him ("Haha you pooped rat poop! You rat! Haha!"). Then he went to the doctor and the doctor told him that he had gotten infected with rabies. He started foaming from the butt. The moral of the story: Don't stick rats up your butt."

"I am having trouble encoding the Slurrey Show, thanks to my megahertz-challenged computer. "

"Adobe Premiere is also a beatiful program; it has a nice unique way of crashing my computer."

"I asked Santa for some broken glass and a bottle full of dead bees, and he told me to go fuck myself, so I gave Rudolph some Viagra and he raped Santa Claus up the ass. Then I had a dream of many dead naked chicks floating in the ocean."

"I dunno how, but I think I puked more stuff than I had actually eaten all week."

"My new year's resolution for 2001? To not make any stupid resolutions."

"I ate a piece of chalk on the Slurry Show. And today I shat it out onto the middle of a sidewalk. Then a dog came by and started licking it, then a rabid purple cat jumped on the dog and humped it up the ass, and a seagull flew by and said "You are a licker of assholes" while shitting out small sperical lead pellets, which hit the dog on the head and killed it. Then I bought a Pepsi."

"Thank you, AOL, for setting back the human race a couple of decades. Retards."

"Having wet feets every day sucks more than my vaccuum when I'm alone in my room with it."

"Well, Napster is going down the shithole. They are going to install a filter so you can't trade copyrighted music.
Ok, Napster is dead. It can't survive off of people downloading homemade stuff like "The Blue Balls - My goldfish farted hydrogen.mp3""

"For now, I must go sleep and dream about kangaroos having bouncy sex with trees. Oh my... we got a wet one here."

"Jerri is just a fucking doberman, and look how big her mouth is compared to the rest of her face! I guess she must have defenitely sucked many large cocks in her lifetime (hey is that why she hasn't been voted off the show yet?). "

"You know how much I hate using the portable toilets at work. They are fucking disgusting. I don't know how someone can be dis-coordinated enough to not be able to shit into the toilet bowl, and end up shitting all over the seat. Every day I go in there, there is shit smeared all over the seat. Jesus, it's like the guy WIPED HIS ASS WITH THE FUCKING TOILET SEAT or something. It's gross, gross enough to sicken the shit out of me. Oh wait, I don't think I could defecate in such a dirty area; my shit would be too frightened to come out. "

"Fuck, I'd rather be pissing gasoline onto a fire than having to piss into that fucking urinal again."

"Actually, I think Jerri brutally raped Colby cause no creature on earth would want to get too close to her stinky black hole (it's so massive that its gravity field sucks even light in, but still manages to let the scent of dead fish waft out). Fucking bitch."

"*Meow Mix* is officially dead, we're sorry to see her go but she gave her life so this site could survive. Well whatever at least she tasted good."

"... but there were unconfirmed reports of some boobage appearing on her cam about 3 am this morning."

"I'd like to smack Britney Spears across the head with a big stick. "

"Elisabeth sure looked weak from the lack of food... if I was there I'd whip out the snake in her face and tell her "Guess what's really high in protein?!" "

"Hey I think I see Sony's evil fucking plan. Once I get a PS2, I will buy many games for it just like I did with the PS1. When the PS3 comes out, my PS2 will suddenly start breaking down... so then I'd have no choice but to buy a PS3 to play all my old PS2 games! THOSE GREEDY KISSERS OF GROIN!!! Motherfuckers, I know they make their products automatically break after they become obsolete, so you would have no choice but to buy their newer shit. Well, lick my dog's tits Sony, I'm a loyal JVC follower now. "

"So I take my shoe off and chuck it at the computer, and scream every 4 letter word ever created at the top of my lungs, while smacking the keyboard with my face. My, what a predicament I was in. Microsoft had me firmly by the balls, and there seemed to be no way out of this any time soon. "

"So before you go through withdrawl, just remember, loves you, and the horse you rode in on."

"I drink, therefore I am."

"I was about to yell out "GODDAMNIT!!!!!!", but knowing that the building across from this site was occupied by many christians, I yelled out "FUCKING COCKSMACK GORILLA SHIT WEATHER!!!" instead."

"I look at the guy. I look around the store. Yes there is other people in here. Yes there is someone over there buying something. Yes this place still seems to be in business. A place that charges $80 do do something a lobotomized chimp could do is still in business. WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS NOT POSSIBLE IT DEFIES ALL LAWS OF PHYSICS AND REASON!! 80 bucks!! Windows! Some fucker is gonna get paid $80 to click "I agree", "Yes", "Ok", "Install", and "Reboot" for 30 minutes!!! INHALER OF FLAMING BUFFALO FARTS!!!!"

"DaGimp also lives in Slurrey and he added me to the cam portal. Pretty awesome site, and the "inappropriate" page made a big hole in my pants and somehow my cat ended up being stuck to the ceiling. Talk about good aim."

"But I still felt so retarded, cause I keep catching fire all the time."

""So you wouldn't let me download the last bit of the MP3, cause you wanted to spank it to monkey porn? That warrants a thorough beating." So I take the keyboard, smack him across the head with it, and then stick it up his ass. I laughed at the humorous situation that had resulted from this, as he was running around the room, trying to get a computer keyboard outta his ass, while "SDJWSEHWEOIHJSADJF*(#@$(*@#&(*#UREISJ" was appearing on the computer screen, over the monkey porn. Then I stole his computer, and used it to listen to the MP3 that I had wanted. Vengeance is sweet and rewarding."

"I'm tired and my creativity has dwindled. Again, I cannot post anything interesting tonight. Blame it on the lack of sleep the past few nights, and extreme sexual encounters with certain vegetation in my back yard."

"I sent mail to Nintendo asking whether the plastic for this thing was the same type as the stuff used for the SNES, cause after a few years my SNES turned yellow. I certainly hope that it's not the same material, because I don't really appreciate people accusing me of urinating on my video game systems. "

"Those assholes at Fateback better get their shit together and hurry up in time... I even hear they are getting their own kids to go in the server room with straws to suck out all the human excrement from between the hard drives."

"Well the cop told me to walk the line.... and I tried to snort it. "

"So I take the PS2, and pack it back in the box. I regret that I forgot to stick a small dog turd inth the expansion slot in the PS2, cause it has ventilation holes in the front, so when Sony would "re-refurbish" that PS2, they'd have a nice smelly surprise waiting for them... well it probably wouldn't smell as bad as the starving dying child laborers they secretly have working in their factories."

"So let me get this straight. The female fish just goes and lays the damn eggs any place she feels like, and some random dude fish goes over to them, thinks "Hey look, some eggs on the ground." and then he procedes to jerk off all over them for no reason other then built in instinct. I will never understand animals."

"Oh my. I just noticed that my new reciever's top seems to be melting. It's really hot and it adds quite a bit of oommpphh to the burning plastic smell already in my room. I guess I should stop piling crap on top of it. Or maybe it's the way I hooked the speakers up and it's causing a short. Either way, at least in the winter time it will heat my room."

"You have convinced me Mr. Borf. Now bend over so you can recieve my investment into your wonderful product."

Thursday, August 01, 2002

Mya's got a kickass new layout that everyone should see! I was pretty damn impressed!

Well, that's all I wanted to say... my uninspired brain really does feel guilty for wasting an entire post on a single plug. Well, it's a REALLY GOOD DAMN PLUG, so go check it out now!
Wow, MiKE pretty much narrowed my whole day down :p...hhmm i do feel a little bad about forcing him to remove the REALLY bad pics of me so I'll post a hideous looking one updated in paint-shop lol!! You know how that damn camera upclose makes everyone look kinda sick lol..I mean, it shows EVERY single pimple, scratch, mole, know, the whole 9 yards PLUS i was kinda drunk so that didn't help much time we go out make sure you're taking pics when I'm actually PAYING attention LMAO!! Anywho, I thought the whole night was pretty much awesome, yeah MiKE you thought getting DOWN the "Cliff" was bad?! lmao, you should've tried climbing UP it while kinda tipsy lol , by that time my drunk was wearing off although after you left I kept drinking Jon's Crown Royal :p yummy! So, I was pretty much in the same state...hahahaha Jon was laughing at me the whole time becuz I almost lost my balance due to Melissa yelling out "HEY OMG YOU GUYS, Isn't this like James Bond 007 style??"...and she said this while I was talking to you on the cell and while I was climbing (in PITCH blackness)...shit I was doing way to many things at once! hahaha, :p..Oh ya here's the awful pic..but I figure I owe MiKE :p :d...buh bye..CRICKETS!!
I updated the Image Galleries page. Go check it out, it now has all the pics of my room, the greece pics, and the scott road fire pics on there.

FIELD TRIP #26 PICS!!!!!!!!!

So yesterday was the fireworks. The day started off with me not knowing what the fuck was going on, so I call Jami and she told me to meet her and her friends at Nanaimo Skytrain station.

At the Scott Road station, I saw Carlie there!! By the time my brain registered that is was her (it took 13.7 seconds), I was about to say hi and the Skytrain door closed in my face. Nice.

So I get down there and I finally meet her and her friends Melissa, Cilla (indy tire chick - she threw and indy tire on the skytrain track a few days ago and now EVERYONE knows about it), and a few other people whose names I forgot. We went to Broadway station and met some more people, then got on the Skytrain to Granville. The retardism on the streets was above its average level. Some guy got punched in the face. Then we got on a bus to go down to Jericho beach, and something really funny happened.

These two really skinny guys start going at it right outside the bus. One guy chases the other around, and then grabbed a bottle. The other guy was like "fuck that shit" and runs towards a pizza place! It was a riot!! Theen the bus driver pulls up by some police men and tells them about the fight, and they go chase and surround the guys like a swat team! Fark I had a good chuckle.

We get to Jericho beach, and to get down to the actual beach by the water, we had to climb down. It was like right outta the movie "Cliffhanger". Jami pretty much slid down the thing too. When we got down to the beach and found a place to sit, the booze and the weed came out. I had 2 beers and didn't smoke any weed. So then Leane called and I tried giving her directions on how to get down to Jericho beach.

We saw lots of seals in the water. Then it started getting dark and I felt the urge to take an uber-piss, so finding a bathroom was top priority. I don't piss in bushes or shit like that, cause.... well.... I've always had a fear of some random animal jumping outta there and biting my dong. But hell, the state that the public washrooms are in nowadays.... I probably have more of a chance of getting my dong bitten off by something in one of those. So me and Jami walk... and walk.... and waaaaaaalk along the fucking beach until finally we get to the public washrooms. I take a piss that seemed to last for an eternity and a half, theen we went back to the beach where everyone else was.

Meanwhile Leane kept calling so I could guide her to where we were sitting. She was up at the dock, and we were down below, and she was trying to find me. So she tells me to stand up and wave around like a moron. Well being the moron I am I did that and she saw me! She had to find a way down to the beach though and that took quite a while, and as soon as she, her sister, and her friends came and sat down, the fireworks were over!

So it seems that Jami would be spending the night here, and I had no idea how to get back to the Skytrain. I was trying to think of something, but it was pretty hard to think when I was so hungry. Meanwhile, Leane and Lindsey were talking about getting something to eat, and it took about 10.4 seconds for my brain to put two and two together.

So I say bye to Jami and her friends, and me , Leane, Lindseey, and their 2 friends went to get some pizza. Many funny things happened while getting pizza, it was interesting. Everyone was taking random pictures of people, and the pizza was really nasty. Then we go, get on the bus, and go to Granville station, and then take the skytrain back. It was a fuckin fun night!
:( punt punt