Wednesday, January 31, 2007

So I bought Zelda: Twilight Princess (Wii version) from El Valito. Now if I can find an actual friggin Wii I'd be all set. Damn shortages!

On the weekend we did some filming, and we watched an amazing movie that barely anyone has ever heard of.

Meet Joe Bowers (Luke Wilson). He's not the sharpest tool in the shed. But when a government hibernation experiment goes awry, Bowers awakens in the year 2505 t...o find a society so dumbed-down by mass commercialism and mindless TV programming that he's become the smartest guy on the planet. Now it's up to an average Joe to get human evolution back on track.

Here's another movie I've been waiting for YEARS to come out. When I first heard that Mike Judge (Office Space, Beavis and Butthead) was working on a new movie, I'm quite sure I shat myself a little. I'm a huge fan of Office Space.

So I waited and waited, the movie was finished and then in their infinite wisdom, fox studios decided to postpone the movie's release indefinitely. Bunch of fucking idiots, cause this movie had the potential to make them a lot of money! When they finally did relase the movie in theatres, it only came out in 7 cities. And I didn't even hear about it being released on DVD, we just happened to find it at the video store.

This flick is incredibly funny and I'm pretty sure it'll get the same cult following that Office Space did. Check it out! Here's the hospital scene, I found on youtube:

Sunday, January 28, 2007


So I bought a laptop today! It was a pretty good deal, $80 for a celeron 866 with windows XP and a bunch of other programs pre-installed on it.

Apparently the old guy I bought it from is a pervert, cause I found his porn stash on it. And 90% of it is camera-phone upskirt shots.

It's sad to think that some people get off to -0.0002 megapixel blurry images of what MIGHT be a panty shot! Ngghaaargghh!

This laptop is SLOW AS FUCK! A really slow fuck that is... picture 2 sloths going at it. Damn CELERONS, that's what you get for making a computer chip out of fuckin' vegetables instead of silicon.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

So today I had an exam convering topics such as inductive and capacitative reactance, phase angles, power factor correction etc. If that all sounds greek to you, no worries I feel the same way. :

I upgraded to the new blogger a while ago and it had a MILLION NEW FEATURES!!! Such as, the inability to search through my old posts, and the complete lack of support for seperate archive pages. Thanks Blogger!

This post brought to you by...

Remember that problem the PS3 had with playing Playstation and Playstation 2 games? Y'know, the glitch that made the graphics look like they had been passed through 10 different bowel movements?

Well it's now fixed. Sort of.

The latest firmware update came out, version 1.50. After installing it, your PS2 games will look better than ever before. And running in progressive scan through HDMI, the games look 10 times better than they ever could on a Playstation 2. Good work Sony!

Except your old playstation 1 games... still look like shit. But it's only noticeable when playing a 2D game, as the 3D games on PS1 look like shit no matter what you play them on.

Playstation 1 had some games with beautiful 2D graphics. Chrono Cross, and the Final Fantasy games especially.

Now you pop them into the PS3, and it mangles the 2D images so that when they scroll, there is a shimmering grid pattern of double pixels over them.

Here's hopin' it's fixed in the next update.

Monday, January 22, 2007

The pics from science world are up, as well as a couple of small parties.


Last friday was another party at Dudley's, even though I was tired as fuck I was STILL capable of looking retarded in 90% of the pics. Yes, it's a lot of work! Don't believe me? Well if it takes 1 muscle to smile, and 42 muscles to frown, can you imagine how many it takes to make a face like this?

Saturday was non-eventful for the most part, there was a lack of motivation in the air or something, so I just hung out with El Valito and yep :)

Sunday I discovered my tire was flat for no reason. My car was just sitting in the garage with a flat tire. How the fuck did it get flat by just sitting there? What an anti-climatic end for a tire. So now I need new tires, cause the replacement tire I got just doesn't feel right.

So remember the pterodactyl porn link my girlfriend sent me? Well, she's at it again! I dunno how she found this one but I'm impressed.


Hahahah "OH SHIT!". Last time I laughed this hard I broke 2 ribs.

On an unrelated note, I find it funny how some people change. Usually when people change, it happens in a self-improving kind of way.... not in the reverting-back-to-high-school-mentality sorta way!

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Oh my god, I actually like a My Chemical Romance song? Fuck someone kill me now..


Nah I'll do it myself! < /emo >

I am selling my PS3 for retail price. Unlike other things I try to sell to people, this one:

- Hasn't been passed through a bowel movement.
- Hasn't been thrown across the room several times.
- Was never considered too much of a health hazard.
- Does not enlarge your penis (I swear.. the other thing wasn't mine!!).
- Does not have teeth marks on it from me being hungry.
- Brand new condition.

So what are you waiting for? If you're interested, I have something called an email address.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

9 Things I Hate About The Internet
(By Xxoozero on shoutwire)

This weeks top nine list is a compilation of things I find annoying on the internet. If you find yourself or a group you represent on this list, which you probably will, just remember; I have no further comment.

1. Mac users
I know, most Mac users are "Happy with their computers" but that is because they don't have a PC. I would be happy with a Honda until I got a Lexus. Also, if I have to watch one more of those stupid "Mac vs. PC" commercials with the old man and the trendy younger gay-looking idiot frat boy, I am going to shoot Steve Jobs in his fucking head.

2. Europeans
Especially the ones who blame all of the world's problems on America and thus all Americans as well. You people know who you are. You're just lucky there was no internet during WWII. Enough said there.

3. Fanboys
These bastards are easy to spot. Whether it is Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, PS3, or Xbox, everywhere you go on the internet you can find two people arguing over fucking brand names. These people need to be taken out and shot. If a game is good, play it. If a movie is good, watch it. Just because one television show is good it does not mean that all the others suck. Write that down.

4. Religious Debate
We now come to the argument that can never be won but will forever be fought. First some asshole Christian has to mention his belief that no one can be saved without Jesus, and then an atheist will respond with a 50 page essay about the dangers of religion, and after that everyone chimes in with bullshit opinions and half assed truths and all hell breaks loose. Everyone except the Buddhists. Somehow, I think 90% of them have no idea what they are supposed to believe and just took the title to be "cool" and "different". Fucking hippies.

5. Nigerian Spam
Ok, show of hands; how many people here actually know where Nigeria is? How the fuck did they get the internet? I thought they were poor? Also, who are these people that actually fall for those stupid "my-client-just-died-now-I-will-give-you-one-million-dollars-for-free" emails? Anyways, we all know there is only one possible solution to this particular problem; baseball bats, Conan swords, and plane tickets to Africa.

6. The dangers of surfing porn
Why does the best thing about being online also have to be the most perilous? There used to be an unwritten rule amongst men that you just do not fuck with another man's porn. These days you are lucky if a 15 minute masturbation session surfing your favorite porn sites won’t earn you three hours of computer clean up time. This is proof that if there is a god it’s most likely a vindictive woman.

7. Advertisements with sound
This is an all too familiar problem for the folks reading this. It's late and your house is dark and quiet. You’re clicking wildly all over the net trying to find something cool when all of a sudden a buzzing noise knocks you halfway out of your chair, forcing you to spill hot coffee all over your crotch making your sperm count low. Whoever the mastermind was behind these advertisements should be hunted down and killed like the animal he or she is. Preferably tortured first. For a long time. A very long time.

8. Internet dating
These people are the worst. "I'm going to find love on the intraweb!:)" Excuse me while I puke. If you can not physically have sex with a woman, and if she does not feed you regularly, she is not your girlfriend. The very term "Internet girlfriend" is a scar on the face of the English language. If you are one of these assholes with a girlfriend online because you can't find one in real life, pick up the nearest bottle of ever clear, douse yourself with it, and do us all a favor by lighting a match. Please instruct your significant other to do the same.

9. LoL
Everyone knows you aren't laughing, so why feel the need to lie about it? Anymore, it is only used as a response to break awkward silence during IM conversations and when someone wants to be overly sarcastic on a message board. It is a good thing this phrase is not usable in real life. Homicide and assault rates would soar, punches in the face would be up 75%, and prison ass rapings would take on a whole new dimension of sickness.

I will leave you with that image. Thank you for reading.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007


Man, I don't even know what to write about today. I can probably blame it on the lack of sleep again.

I went to bed last night at like 11. I have to wake up at 6, so that's a good 7 hours of sleep right? Not when I don't actually fall asleep until like fuckin 2 am! Or better yet are the times when I wake up in the middle of the night for 3 hours!

The best part is, I have no problem falling asleep... IN THE MIDDLE OF CLASS. And possibly in the middle of writing this post.


Monday, January 15, 2007

On friday I went and played BINGO with Ash Tracy and Cory. Yep you read that right, BINGO. Even though the average age of the people there was probably 3 times our age, it was still a fun experience. Though it'd be even funner if any of us actually won anything :P

Afterwards we went to a party and I decided I'd be sober that night. Well ok... that decision was kinda made for me by my neglectfulness in bringing anything to drink. Luckily though Britney kept giving me shots of fireball to ease the pain of being sober, and I had some of Kyle's jager too! Ah sharing, it truly does make the world a better place.

Saturday I fucked this site up, fixed it, and fucked it up again. You might have even caught a glimps of how mangled this site was if you came here on saturday! God, who knew that ONE html tag in the wrong place could have such horrid results!

Afterwards we went to movie night at Cory and Tracy's and watched The Good Sheperd. Or tried to, I couldn't really get into it! So we just bullshat around downstairs into the wee hours of the night. Then I drove Jessika back home to white rock into the wee-er hours of the night. The dinner she owes me will totally be worth it.

SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY.... me, Valito, Eric, Steph, Taryn, and Robin went to Science World to see the Body Worlds 3 exhibit. Fuck that blew my mind!!! Just being able to see the vast amounts of differnt stuff inside the human body and how they make it work, and they way they showed bodies opened up was real interesting. Basically I learned more about how the body works there in 1 hour than I did in all my school science classes combined. And in a way I'll never forget too :) And yeah out of sheer curiosity I touched a couple of the bodies to see what it felt like... creepy.

Also one of the exhibits showed a regular lung compared to a smoker's lung. The regular one was damn near white, while the smoker's lung was BLACK and disgusting looking. Beside that exhibit there was a glass box that scared smokers could chuck their cigarettes in. And that box was full. Well no shit, after seeing THAT!

If you missed, there's still a chance to see it if you feel like going all the way down to seattle. It's worth it. You'll get to see all that crap inside of you that makes you function, without having to cut yourself open like some suicidal emo kid!

Cha cha!

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Wow the weather has been fucked lately!! The past week has been pure chaos. Thousands of accidents, traffic jams everywhere, etc. All from a horrendous 2 cm of snow!!!!!

Welcome to Vancouver. I can hear all of eastern Canada laughing from here.

I wonder what would happen if an actual disaster, like an earthquake happens here. The whole lower mainland might as well just sink into a large asshole-shaped abyss. No one here is prepared for anything, and the people who ARE actually prepared are gonna have their chances of survival hindered by those who aren't!
I would like to take a moment with you all to show you the type of things people search for and end up stumbling on this site.

"girlfriends mom fucks daughters boyfriend"
"log straight flushed turd"
"http //" (ya think?!)
"my parents caned me naked and pinched my penis hard"
"when can i get a ps3 in canada"
"woman with banana in pussy blowing gorilla"
"i saw his dick at the urinals"
"what is the population of surrey 2007?"
"2 surrey girls on halloween"
"guy farts in girls face while she s licking his ass"
"wife on the toilet"

The internet frightens me. And it frightens me more that with some of those search terms, my site came up as the results!

Another thing that puzzles me, even though this site is based in Canada, most of our traffic comes from the US and Ireland. Wft?!

Thursday, January 11, 2007

We are moving to a new server.

15 GB space, 750 GB/month bandwidth.

Yes, I am finally PAYING someone to host slurrey! This is just a warning though, that the site may be down for a little while.

Yeah that's right I'm posting the pics from the new years party 2 WEEKS LATER. Not that it really matters, any true slurrey fan would know that the message board is the first place party pics get posted! Hell, they were even on the field trips page for the last week and a half.

New years, if I remember correctly, kicked 39032 tons of ass. I just drank a bottle of jagermeister and I was set. I think I remember most of the night, though when I try to recover specific details I really can't do it! Perhaps this is a result of me trying to write about something I did 2 FRIGGIN WEEKS AGO!

At around 3 or 4 am I started to get the friggin spins... right after the 3rd lung we did outside. Man, some things are just not meant to be mixed. I think I spent some of the night face-first in the carpet. And I do believe there were a couple of brief encounters with the toilet while I TRIED to puke, thinking I'd feel better If I did. Didn't work, I haven't puked in years, so I think my body kinda forgot how to. I ended up passed out on Dudley's bed for a while.

Most guys, if they woke up crammed between 2 girls, would probably think it's a good situation to be in. Me? Well it just reminded me how claustrophobic I am. I made my way to the bathroom again, looked at the toilet, realized I had nothing to offer the porcelain god from either end, and went back and passed out some more.

Not even an hour later we woke up to the most hilarious shit ever. It was legendary. Someone who was really drunk (and still drinking) wanted to walk home.. which was 2 hours away. He only made it a block before passing out in someone's lawn. That's awesome. Then when Britney brought him back, he fell down the stairs, and then tried to escape out of the tiny bathroom window. Awesome!

AND THAT WAS NEW YEARS! But that's not all!


Most people think that 2006 sucked balls. Big balls, small balls, y'know.. the reproductive kind. Well I think 2006 was one of the greatest years ever.

There was a decent of good parties, I made a lot of new friends, we actually took advantage of summer, etc. A good 99% of the year was fine and dandy, and the 5% that wasn't (I suck at math, shutup!) wasn't toooo bad. Hmm where do we begin...


- THE NEW SLURREY CAM. I got a new digital camera, a FUJI FinePix F10. My old camera, which is so old I think there's still pics of dinosaurs on the memory card, just wasn't cutting it for party pics anymore.

- PIT PARTIES. We thought the pit was gone... but nope. I only ended up throwing 3 pit parties that summer, and they were all so good that the pit will be fondly remembered as one of the best party places. RIP Pit.... you were awesome before you were conquered by bulldozers and 15 year olds.

- SUMMER. Fuck this is the first summer where we actually took advantage of the good weather.. EVERY WEEKEND. We went to countless lakes, beaches, trails, etc. And camping was rad as well.

- PARTYING AT TRACY'S. There was a good 2 months or more, where we partied at Tracy and Cory's every weekend. One of those months, they lived 3 houses down from me so after partying I could just point myself in the general direction of my house, and 9 times out of 10 I'd end up home. It was great!


- THE GREAT SLURREY SPLIT UP. While slurrey is generally a drama free place, when so many people are meeting so many other people some conflict is unavoidable. So for a while, some people wouldn't come hang out if certain other people were coming, etc. In the end, everyone patched their shit up with each other and things are as good as ever!

- My car getting hit with a drunk driver's tire. Yeah, while partying at Tracy and Cory's, some drunk fag hit a bunch of cars on the street I was parked on, and the tire flew off his truck and hit my car at full force. I had to drive my car, with my smashed in trunk for a month and a half before I could get it fixed. I never felt so ghetto in my life.

- Getting laid off after school was finished. That was lame, but then again, I'm now working for a much better company!

THATS ALL I CAN THINK OF! And right now, 2007 looks like it's gonna be twice as awesome as 2006.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

While I haven't updated this site in a while, it's because there's a lot of stuff going on here behind the scenes.

First of all, SLURREY IS ABOUT TO BE HOMELESS AGAIN. Our host, AKA-hosting, is offing itself in the next few days, leaving us without any hosting. So for the past few days I've been scrambling to find proper hosting for slurrey.

Next up I'm changing the way posts work on this site. You can now link to any individual post I make. Coming up next will be embedded comments in post pages and other neat shit that other sites have and this one doesn't!

Stay tuned for some exciting news! AND My "BEST OF 2006" post.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

It's been an eternity since I last updated. You see, I had a week off from work, and I just wanted to relax.

Not saying that posting here isn't relaxing.... I always feel like a better person after throwing a few f-bombs and whatnot onto the internets through this site! It's like taking a shit, and the internet is my toilet.

Christmas was alright I guess. Not the merriest christmas ever but I got some good shit:

- Sexy DS Lite (Black) and V for Vendetta (HD-DVD) from Vuv
- $200 from parents
- $50 from Vuv's parents
- Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas (HD-DVD) and LCD screen from Steven

I already have V for Vendetta and Fear and Loathing on DVD, but goddamn. I have to upgrade my whole DVD collection to HD-DVD. Cause once you get used to seeing movies in high definition, you just CAN'T go back to regular DVD. It looks like blurry, pixellated shit!

.... my DVD collection right now consists of over 100 movies. Fuck me :(

On boxing day I bought something awesome. My car has a DVD player in it, but no LCD screen to watch movies on. Car LCD screens cost $300-$400 bucks, which is ridiculously overpriced for what you get.

Best buy was selling a DUAL SCREEN DVD PLAYER for only $180! By now you should see where I'm goin with this. I bought it, took the extra acreen, and wired it directly to my car. The video quality is actually pretty good! The portable DVD player itself.... I'm just gonna sell for like $125. If anyone wants to buy it, gimme a shout on msn.

On my week off I stayed as far away from the computer as possible. Roughly about 5 feet away, since I spent a good 25 hours in the past week in front of the TV playing Chrono Trigger. When I wasn't time travelling and saving the world, I was either sleeping or blowing stuff up.

YEP for the first time in months we blew some shit up. I think we went through $20 worth of gasoline in that night. There were mushroom clouds galore, and it was all captured on video! The resulting footage will give any pyromaniac out there wet dreams for a week straight, and I'll be posting it here shortly.

I also saw the movie Apocalypto. I was not disappointed. You won't be either. GO SEE IT.

I'm gonna write a post about new years (and 2006 in general) next. The new years party was LEGENDARY, just wait till you see the pics. If your impatient ass can't wait, they're already posted on the slurrey message board.