Sunday, April 24, 2011

Sometime I wish I pooped out coins and jewels. Not the singer Jewel, that would hurt. I'm talking about shiny expensive jewels like rubies and diamonds. Those would probably hurt a bit too.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Didn't post here for a while since I've been having a few problems with my blog. Well, more like Google has a problem with my blog, as my Adsense account didn't get approved. Turns out that you shouldn't change your blog URL while you're waiting for them to approve your Adsense account. So I fuck that up, then instead of re-submitting the Adsense application I filled out an appeal form and waited for a response. Turns out I wasn't getting any response because my account didn't exist in the first place. I done goofed up!

I'm new to this whole ad revenue thing, but I figure I better figure it out. A bit of extra income to put more food (and booze) in my belly would be quite swell.

In other news, life is good. School is easier than a surrey girl (yes this site is called Slurrey, we do make surrey girl jokes). I'm going to the gym on a semi-regular basis now, eating healthier, and I've quit coke. The soft drink, dipshit. I'm also trying to eat as much as physically possible without getting fat, but it's a tricky process. My metabolism is like a kid who just got his license and a Ferrari. Pedal pushed through the floor burning 8395482 calories typing this post, which really sucks because to gain any lean mass I have to eat the equivalent of Ethiopia's entire food supply... which is like 8 meals a day. How to keep unhealthy food out of those meals is tricky, cause healthy food is way more goddamn expensive.

Today it snew for a grand total of 10 minutes. Typical Vancouver cock-tease weather. Come on, where's the worst winter in 50 years, Farmer's Almanac? I'd wipe my ass with that thing if the pages weren't so glossy and ineffective. Got a taste of driving my truck in the snow with that last snowfall, but I crave more.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

So I log into facebook today to do whatever the fuck I do on facebook, and I notice that my profile page looks like a scattered mess of links and failure. For a while now, facebook has been trying to get me to "upgrade" my profile, but I always had the option not to. A good choice, as I enjoyed having an easy to navigate, coherent profile with tabs separating each section.

The illusion of choice didn't last long and it looks like facebook has decided to force the new profile on me anyways. Thanks facebook. Thanks Mark Fuckerburg, you really know what your users want. Douchenozzle.

Since 2007 I've watched layout updates slowly devolve the look and feel of the site, removing features, and fucking up personal privacy in more ways than thought possible. Dear lord I could shit a better layout on a piece of toilet paper!

(A typical day at Facebook HQ)

No joke, this is part of the reason I'm bringing Slurrey back, slowly but surely. The way Facebook is going, in a couple of years it'll look like a website from 1995. Unless we revolt, and fling feces at their servers or something.

Monday, January 17, 2011

So it's 2011 now, and as you can see I have not touched this fucking thing since January 2010. I've been too busy touching other things.

I don't have any hosting for slurrey.com right now, as you need money for that and most of my money is being spent keeping me fed and non-sober. A lifestyle where you do stuff like drive, eat, and avoid homelessness in vancouver is pretty expensive. Yeah, I moved from Surrey to Vancouver a year ago. Some would consider it an upgrade, but sometimes I miss my days of tire fire parties and shopping cart jousting.

(This shopping cart was defective)

I'm actually going to try and update this thing as often as an average human's bowel movements. Why I don't refer to my own.... well let's just say that the quality of my diet is inversely proportional to the money I have to spend on food.